The Woman Wild Oracle — Spirituality for the Resistance
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Trigger warning: I am a lefty, progressive feminist. My spirituality infuses my politics, ergo politics are mentioned in my writings. If you are looking for just the spiritual,
you might want to check out another page.
Blessings, Kat
Last weekly card to be posted April 3rd, 2017
Dear Readers, As of April, 2017, the weekly card will be on hiatus. I have been hired to ghost write a novel and am not going to be able to devote the needed time that the weekly card demands. I will still be available for readings and soul counseling. Much love, Kat
Weekly Card: 3/20/2017 — RELEASE
There is a meme making that makes the rounds on face book, around this time every year. The meme claims that Easter is named after Ishtar and derived from her worship. This is a flat out lie and was presented by the anti-Christian and Christianity critic, Richard Carrier.
In order to study the ancient Gods and Goddesses you have to read myth, which Carrier clearly has not. The Goddess is eternal; She never dies — Maid, Mother, Crone — one gives way to the other. You can’t crucify, i.e. kill something, namely the cycle of life, death and re-birth, that is eternal. Ishtar is a Goddess of Sexual Love and Battle. Her symbols include a gate guarded by lions, the eight-pointed star, dates, wool, meat, and grains. None of these are fertility symbols.
The most important Ishtar story is the story of her descent to the underworld. The myths vary on the why of the visit, but they all agree that as she passed through the gates to the underworld she was stripped of her finery and her jewels. She was naked by the time she got to Ereshkigal, the Queen of the Underworld and her shadow sister, who promptly hung her from a hook and left her there. (Yes, ultimately she took her down.) If you’ve read Women Who Run With Wolves, by Clarissa Pinkola Estes, you know that every woman is a twin; composed of her light and dark selves. Taking in our shadow, our dark self, is the task of the conscious woman. Living the ever-changing balance between the two is the dance of the adept. This is essentially what Ishtar’s myth is about. Oh dear, I’ve digressed once again, but I just get so angry, when I read bullshit like Easter-was-based-on-Ishtar, and hear it bandied about as truth. There are enough obvious, overt connections between Christian and pagan theory and holidays without having to make up lies.
Easter took its name from the Teutonic Goddess of spring, Eostre, a Germanic Goddess who represents springtime, new growth, and rebirth. Her symbols include eggs, rabbits, chicks, flowers, and seeds, and March 20th, the vernal equinox, is her sacred day. According to myth, Esotre was late one year bringing the warm weather, and a little bird almost froze to death. A young girl found the bird lying in the snow and prayed for Esostre’s help. Suddenly a rainbow bridge appeared and Esostre walked across, wearing a red robe of brilliant sunlight. Her sunlight melted the snows and spring arrived. The bird though was too far-gone and the little girl couldn’t stop crying. What I love about Goddesses is they inevitably know exactly what to do to make things better. Esotre changed the bird into a snow hare; a snow hare that brought rainbow eggs, and hid them in the woods and the meadows. The child was delighted! The child’s joy was Eostre’s joy, and as she hugged the little girl goodbye, she told her to keep an eye out for the snow hare and his rainbow eggs because that’s how she’d know spring was beginning.
Eostre, vernal/spring equinox, also known as Ostara, is about growth and opening to new, life changing experiences. It’s time to try something really new, step out of your comfort zone, and go for joy. This year vernal equinox falls on a waning moon, and magically a waning moon is about letting go, releasing, and banishing. So how to work with this week’s energy? Use the energetic ingredients that are present.
Any equinox has equal hours of light and dark so right off the bat, the energy for creating balance is strong. It’s also a waning moon, so you have powerful energy for releasing. Add the two together and you have the perfect energy for a spell that releases blocks to balance. Key to balance is self-acceptance. The most powerful spell for the week then, would have to do with releasing blocks to self-love and approval; the big blocks; the ones that are part of your socialization, and keep your self-esteem low.
They’re lots of great releasing spells. One of my favorites is filling a pasta pot with water and placing a candleholder on the bottom of the pot. Then take a black candle and rub it all over you body, feeling whatever it is you want to release going into the candle. Stick the candle in the holder and light. When the candle flame hits the water and goes out, the spell is complete. I’ve also been known to write whatever I want gone from my life on a small piece of paper and burn it. I do that three days in a row and toss the ashes to the wind each day.
The most effective affirmations you can do during any waning moon, release and ask to be released. For instance: I release my fear of success and ask that it release me. I release my fear of intimacy and ask that it release me. I release whatever it was in a past life and this life that keeps me at subsistence level and ask that it release me. I release debt and ask that it release me. You see? Try it right now and feel the difference.
So let’s say for the next week, you say a daily releasing affirmation such as — I release scarcity consciousness and ask that it release me. At new moon, (March 27th, 10:57 p.m.) waxing moon, you would begin to say — Money flows to me freely, in profusion, and endlessly. See how they work together? How doing one makes the other stronger? This kind of work is an act of self-love. An act of self-love has virtually nothing to do with being good, and everything to do with making space for the woman becoming.
Live loud, love fierce, and suffer no fools. Kat
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"You couldn’t look at what I was seeing and not get it smack clear that man so loved what he’d made, he flat-out ignored what he’d been freely given."
Genesis 2: The Passion of Emma Ray Earle.
Weekly Card: 3/6/2017 — COSMIC ORDER — Right Relationship To Self
When I pulled the cosmic order card, the first thing I thought about was the Gaia theory. The theory was formulated by British scientist, Dr. James Lovelock in the 60’s and co-developed with his colleague, Lynn Margulis, in the 70’s. As per the two scientists, Gaia (the earth) is:
“A complex entity involving the Earth’s biosphere, atmosphere, oceans and soil. Organisms interact with their inorganic surroundings on Earth to form synergistic, self-regulating, complex systems to maintain and perpetuate the conditions for life on the planet…..”
What this means to me is the Earth is alive and She is intrinsically intelligent. A goodly portion of the scientific community does not agree. There is life on earth, they say, but the earth itself is neither alive nor intelligent. These are the same scientists who say fracking is harmless. Any human being with a modicum of instinct, intuition, and common sense knows fracking is not harmless, just like any human being with a modicum of instinct, intuition, and common sense knows the earth is alive.
As per the Gaia theory — everything is interconnected. To every action, there is a reaction. I love that — science and sacred teaching come together. Right now. Over me. (Sorry, couldn’t resist!) The life of one thing depends on the life of the other, and that life depends on the life of another, and so on and so on. The physical, mental, spiritual, and emotional health of human beings is dependent on the health of the environment, a fact patriarchy absolutely refuses to accept, even though the proof of interconnectedness is smack-you-up-the-side-of-the-head clear. Take fracking, again. The chemicals used in fracking poison the water table. The water table poisons the land. Calves are born deformed, crops die, farms are put out of business, and whole towns are without water and go bankrupt. Though the people who live in fracked areas protest and hold town meetings, they are stonewalled. Some towns even vote to outlaw fracking, only to have the decision reversed by the courts. Bottom line — the people who live in fracked areas are powerless in the face of big money. Big money gets what big money wants and only revolution will change that. When I think revolution, I think of people from all walks of life, standing together in their individual power, and joining hands. The more powerful we are individually, the more powerful we are together. This is not a time to look for the messiah. This is a time when we are being called upon to be our own messiah. That’s what the second coming is all about, anyway.
We’re in luck, here. The planetary line-up for the next six months is pushing you, none to gracefully, to know who you are and to live authentically. The planets are quite literally pushing you to own your power. This week it’s like the blinders are being ripped off, and all of a sudden you will be sharply aware of what you love and what you loathe; what’s extremely harmful to you and what’s extremely of benefit. That’s the lens you’ll be looking through, whether you want to or not. Though the little men in the white coats may feel a bit too close on some days, you’re not crazy. What’s happening is your old survival mechanisms are coming up to be cleared because they’re no longer of any value to you. They’re tough to release because at one time they were absolutely intrinsic to your survival. What happens as we grow and evolve though, is old survival mechanisms start to hold us back and begin to define the parameters of our lives. We may end up with a different narrative, but the themes remain the same. Though unconscious, painful feelings trigger old survival mechanisms, survival mechanisms are not a feeling. They’re a response; something solid that shuts the feelings down, which will then shut sown something else, and something else, and so on, and so on. Old survival mechanisms deny your access to that which needs to be acknowledged, owned, taken apart, and transformed. The point is right relationship to self. If you are continually coming up lacking in your own eyes, you can trust that your relationship to self is skewed.
Repeating the same behavior over and over and expecting different results is the most blatant way a stuck survival mechanism manifests. The way you live, perceive, respond, and process your life remains unchallenged. There’s pain, yes but the pain is familiar; we’re used to it. Like Skinner’s rats who’ve been shocked against their will for so long that when the door to the cage is opened and the current is turned on once more, they refuse to leave the cage. I once asked my guides why people didn’t change. They said, “Because change is extraordinarily painful.” In my experience change is extraordinarily painful; looking under the rock of repeating behavior and feelings hurts like hell. But the difference between the new pain of change and the old familiar pain is it passes and something brand new is born. It’s like labor pains and then you birth the baby.
I am not a woman who thinks that you don’t need survival mechanisms and the ability to defend yourself. You do, but what you’re defending has to serve your life, not limit it by protecting old wounds. One of the most dysfunctional teachings that has come out of the New Age is that life is supposed to be easy, and if we’re doing what we’re supposed to do, life will just flow merrily on. That’s a total crock. Even if you’re doing exactly what you’re supposed to be doing, life can be easy, hard, and everything in between. Each of us is a galaxy unto ourselves. Take a moment, google galaxy, and look at the pictures. That’s what your invisible looks like and it contains your very own cosmic order. The conspiracy theorist in me thinks patriarchy, and its socializing institutions, purposely conspires to keep human beings from knowing who and what they really are, to keep them powerless and on their knees. Right relationship to self is the first step in taking your power back. I talk a lot about power, which is not popular in New Age circles. People talk compassion, they talk tolerance, and you are cautioned to avoid judgment. Yet without power you are prey, and without sane judgment, you’re a naïve fool, well intentioned but a malleable link in the growing chain of resistance. What really bugs me is the idea that you can’t be powerful and compassionate, tolerant, and judge when judgment is called for. Right use of power is love made visible. Oh dear, I’ve digressed.
Right relationship to self, demands that you own your power to change. Right relationship to self demands that you judge, weigh one thing against another, and choose what is intuitively, instinctively best for you. Right relationship to self is how we begin to reclaim the pieces of self that have been splintered off by life; pieces you think are wrong, or not good enough, or not spiritual enough. This week, choose one thing that you think is wrong with you. Than write down its opposite and draw a straight-line connecting them. Everything contains its opposite, not in terms of opposing but in terms of compliment. Think on the qualities of the opposites on either end of the same line, ask yourself, “Where’s the compliment here?” Then do the alchemy exercise in the newsletter.
Right relationship to self is the ultimate action of self-love because it opens you to your own cosmic order. That’s what authenticity is; your own cosmic order. Cosmic order, yours and the Universe’s, is sacred, not made by man and his kind, but something with which you were born, that was freely given. In the week ahead, look in the mirror three times a day and say, “I love myself beyond all reason.” And when the energy is feeling a little bouncy, think about dropping a root from the base of your spine deep into the ground, and drawing in sane, soothing Earth energy. This is not the week to get into an argument; count to ten and take a breath before you answer. “Can I get back to you about that?” is one of the greatest neutralizing questions ever. Never forget how brave, each and every one of you are. I am so grateful you're here.
Live loud, love fierce, and suffer no fools. Kat x0x0x0
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MARCH NEWSLETTER
PSYCHIC READINGS, SOUL READINGS, HEALINGS, WOMAN WILD COUNSELING, OH MY!
"You cain’t kill a dream. You can murder the people having it for sure, but anything with a heart is always reborn, and each time, it’s born stronger and stronger."
Genesis 2: The Passion of Emma Ray Earle
Weekly Card: 2/27/2017 — IMAGINE
Imagining something wonderful has been quite a challenge for me recently, and for a whole lot of people I know. I am absolutely guilty of wading in the mire of the dystopian present, and there are days I just can’t twist free. But I have to. This dawned on me and has continued to dawn on me, since Thursday night when I landed in bed with a back spasm, where I have remained ever since. (Well, there and the couch.) I have to break free. I cannot permanently live in the quicksand of daily atrocities. I’ve written lefty politics for years so I am deeply immersed in what’s happening, and my sense of powerlessness is growing. I am not a woman who is afraid of admitting when she feels powerless. I also hold true that anyone who says he/she never feels powerless is either lying, out of touch with self and soul, or a sociopath.
In my experience of powerlessness, I find my power. I accept what can’t be changed and find the courage to change the things I can. I can’t change the fact that Trump won; I can however exercise my right as a citizen of a democracy to resist policies that I think are destructive to human beings and the planet. I can be part of the resistance. I seriously doubt we’re going to win, but here’s the thing. We’re not letting the dream die — the dream of a safer, fairer, and more equitable world; a world where the wonders of life and living are for all of us, and not just a select few. If you study history, you’ll see the dream is global, and the dream and variations on the dream, have been handed down for thousands of years. The dream has heart and anything with heart is always reborn.
You were born with imagination. You were born with the ability to imagine, to dream, and to fantasize. Imagination is of the heart; it’s a way of giving self love, and when we give love to self we can freely give it others because we’re coming from a full tank. Imagination steps out of fantasy and into the tangible when we start to take the physical actions needed to create what we’re imagining. Imagination has never been more important than right now because in the mire of the dystopian present, your dream of what can be for you (I’m talking outside of politics and the resistance) loses life. It seems less important somehow and anyway what’s the point? This is the challenge for people committed to living sacred/spiritual/conscious/authentic lives right now — remembering the truth of our being and the work that is written on our souls to do. We can’t deny what’s happening, and that resistance is now as much a part of out lives as breathing; at the same time, we can’t be controlled by it. Sometimes it's easy to forget there is more to life and living then the daily atrocities showing up on facebook. The task of the soul is to remember that you have a reason to be here and that you have a specific purpose. You are multi-talented, you are multi-dimensional; do not let any person, place, or thing reduce you to either/or.
This week, get out in nature as much as you can. Practice dropping a root from the base of your spine deep into the earth and feel the deliciousness of green earth energy flowing up that root and into your body. Pay attention to the sensory this week. Feel the sun on your face, the wind in your hair, and hot water from the shower running down your back. Feel the warmth of your bed when you wake up in the morning, taste peanut butter and honey melting on warm pita. Whatever feels good, give yourself some, and then give yourself even more. (Drugs, booze, and food not included!) This will start to bring you back to why you’re on the planet, and what’s written on your soul to do while you’re here. Imagine.
Live loud, love fierce, and suffer no fools. Kat
P.S. If you like the weekly card and know someone with whom you think it will resonate, please forward it on!
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Weekly Card: 2/20/2017 — BEAUTY
“From the perspective of Jungian psychology, patriarchy may be seen as an expression of a stunted, immature form of masculinity and thus as an attack on masculinity in its fullness as well as on femininity in its fullness…” King, Warrior, Magician, Lover. R Moore and D Gillette, 1990, p. xvii.
In the 80’s, I found myself in an affirmation class based on something called strategic learning systems. The point of the affirmations was to remove our self-esteem from culture’s invalidating paradigm. We all judge ourselves — this has its necessary benefits and it’s agonizing drawbacks — and is as vital to living a conscious life as breathing. The question is what are we judging ourselves against? As per the class, we judged our beauty, intelligence, and sensuality against patriarchal standards. Intelligence then was an Ivy League education, beauty was a gorgeous or handsome movie star, and sensuality was a Sports Illustrated bathing suit model. This stratified things nicely for advertisers; whatever they were selling would make us whatever we weren’t. I remember thinking, that’s how they control us; we’re supposed to be this, that, or the other, and since we’re not, they make us think we’re bad, and then sell us a something to fix it. (P.S. numerous studies have proven me right!)
Most of the women I know, no matter what their age, are not Sports Illustrated models, and do not look like Angelina Jolie. Does that make any of us less beautiful? No. It. Does. Not. Please know I’m not disparaging the attractiveness of models or movie stars, but it’s too narrow a definition, and remarkably arbitrary. Back in the 1800’s if you’d been as skinny as say Kate Moss, you would not have fit the criteria of beauty. You would have fit the criteria of a woman in the poor house; a starving, feral creature with dirty feet, who smelled just awful.
One of the affirmations we had to say in the class was, “I am beautiful.” We actually had to stand up in class and say it in front of everyone. Over time what happened is not only did I begin to hold true I was beautiful but I saw everyone else in the class as beautiful. What I said about me was true about them, and what they said about themselves was true about me. I don’t know if I’m explaining this correctly, but it was so profound and it changed me at the core. It’s a rare spiritual/sacred teaching that doesn’t teach you’re beautiful, we’re all children of God/Goddess/The Universe, but what happened to me in that class was experiential. It wasn’t an intellectual exercise. If you have a group of people who honestly believe they’re beautiful, they are going to mirror the beauty in each other. What I didn’t know then but know now, was I was seeing the “feed;” the feed between the inner and outer reality of a human being. When that feed is connected, we are a perfect mirror.
I am not a person who thinks that when you have difficulty with another person it’s because they’re mirroring what you don’t like about yourself back at you. Think about fun house mirrors for a minute; the one where your reflection is tremendously distorted. I have found, more often than not, that when someone has difficulty with another person, it’s usually because they’re a crooked mirror. Part of conscious living is knowing when you’re looking into a crooked mirror. How do you know when you’re looking into a crooked mirror? You come away feeling drained, less than, and like all the life has been sucked out of you. Another clue is the argument/discussion resolves/changes nothing and trying to make yourself understood is an exercise in futility.
As a feminist in the early 70’s, beauty was a mind field. I remember visiting a friend at a college other than mine and being confronted by a particularly strident feminist, in the hall bathroom, who told me shaving my legs meant I was oppressed by patriarchy. She knew I was a feminist, we’d had the conversation earlier, but clearly I wasn’t feminist enough in her eyes.
“But I like my legs smooth,” I said.
“No,” She said. “Patriarchy taught you that.”
“No, patriarchy taught me I can either be a virgin or a whore. That’s why I’m shaving my legs, I’m opting for whore.”
The feminists I knew back in the day didn’t wear any make-up and couldn’t have cared less about their clothes. I did wear make-up, I loved tight-ass jeans, crop tops, and my candies, and it pissed me off to no end that because of my fondness for such things I was considered less of a feminist. Yes, I knew I was supposed to be appreciated as much for my mind as my body, but if I had to wear sackcloth and no make-up in order to get someone to recognize my mind, wasn’t I just feeding another stereotype – the plain, smart girl? Furthermore where was the man’s responsibility in all this? Why was this all on me?? If some man was only thinking about my body and not my mind, why was this my fault??
At the same time if I didn’t look a certain way, I had a hard time just being. My appearance did mean something to me. That other’s found me attractive made me feel good about myself and I personally don’t think there’s anything wrong with that. The problem I had, and so many women I have worked with had, is that our self-worth was tied to our looks. Of course it was, we live in a patriarchy; a woman’s worth in a patriarchy is directly tied their attractiveness. As I have aged I find I am increasingly invisible because youth is an integral part of what patriarchy defines as attractive.
What I have loved watching and being part of over the past 64 years is the Tribe of Women’s evolving relationship to beauty. There is no question women are re-defining and re-claiming their beauty, as something that belongs to them. If you have any doubt this is happening, check out the Dove Real Women campaign; the Lane Bryant, “I’m No Angel,” Campaign; and the “Aerie Real” Campaign. Like any of these companies would be running body positive campaigns, featuring the women in your gym locker room, if there wasn’t real money in it.
What I see in the faces of the women in those body positive ads is the same kind of rich, connected joie de vivre I saw in the faces of my fellow students all those years back in my affirmation class. It’s the same kind of beauty I see in my friends when we get together for coffee, dinner, or a bitch and moan session. The feed between the inner and outer realities is alive in all of us. I live in the mountains alongside the Hudson River. I am surrounded by spectacular beauty. As a witch I hold true that each of us is a much a part of nature as leaf and bud, rock and soil, river and mountain. The life force that animates nature animates you and me. The life force of nature is wild and beautiful, meaning we are animated by wild beauty. To narrow beauty down to a surface thing destroys the feed between the inner and outer realities, it destroys the wild, and renders the true meaning of beauty null and void.
Ancient Celtic Queens were buried with their mirrors. Some say it was a status thing, but I don’t know. My gut instinct tells me (and this could be a total projection) that it had something to do with remembering who you were. My theory is they looked into the mirror to remember who they were, beautiful, in the truest sense of the word. For just a moment, take a second and imagine what it would feel like to know you are beautiful. I don’t care if you’ve got green clay on your face and breath that could kill at 20 paces, take a second this very moment, and imagine what it feels like to know you are beautiful beyond words.
This week my darlings, every time you look into a mirror say, “I am beautiful.” Every time you catch your reflection in a mirror say, “I am beautiful.” Say, “I am beautiful,” first thing in the morning, and last thing at night. Nothing terrifies patriarchy more than women who don’t give a rat’s ass what it thinks.
Live loud, love fierce, and suffer no fools, Kat x0x0x0
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I have a new Yelp Page!
For those of y'all who sent reviews, thank-you, thank-you, thank-you.
(I'm really irritated they didn't publish all my reviews and put the ones they didn't publish under "reviews not currently recommended." When I called to complain, they're reasoning had nothing to do with the real reason, which is they got slammed with reviews from my clients and the computer couldn't keep up so they relegated to reviews not currently recommended as if they're fakes. I was so upset I can't even begin to tell you! K)
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SOUL READINGS
I am on the planet to help people live true to self and soul. I am on the planet to help people uncover who they are, live from that authenticity, and know love beyond all reason. Soul readings, a delicious blend of the psychic, the Jungian, and Goddess teachings are the result.
I look under the issues, to the feelings, and to what is creating the reality, that has you so confused and/or you want to change. I will ask you questions: what themes are replaying over and over, what do you love, what do you want most in your life? These are the questions that have to be answered if you want change in your world. Knowing self is power and right use of power, to create and impact your life, is love made visible.
I am a wide-open channel for healing, teaching, and guidance, and work with whatever tools are needed for the reading. Tarot, astrology, numerology, past lives, Spirit guides, angels, the Fey, the dead, Patron Gods and Goddesses. The tools I use in any given reading are determined by Spirit.
I may not always tell you what you want to hear, but I will lovingly tell you the truth, help you get out from under the critical voices in your head, and explain your best course of action and the practical and magical steps to get you there.
I am located in Saugerties, New York. I do readings at home, by phone, and by Skype. Please be advised that all first time readings are done on phone or by Skype unless you have been referred to me by a long term client.
I do take Paypal. All Paypal transactions are $5 more.
Payment is due before the reading.
30 Minutes = $60 45 minutes = $90 60 Minutes = $130
FOR AN APPOINTMENT OR MORE INFORMATION
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My novel Genesis 2: The Passion of Emma Ray Earle is up on Amazon
For more information about the book
Weekly Card: 2/6/2017 — DISCERN
Swords are of the air and air is of the mind. In Buddhism, swords represent discrimination of thought; they cut away ignorance. Ancient Celtic warriors viewed their swords as extensions of their being-ness. The life force that flowed through them flowed through their swords. When I drew the sword card, I immediately thought of the Queen of Swords. Do you remember Superman’s Fortress of Solitude? It was somewhere up high and hidden in the snowy mountains, impossible for human beings to reach, and filled with crystals of wisdom. The first time I saw the fortress of solitude in the Superman movie, I gasped and said, “Omigoodness, it’s the Queen of Sword’s natural home.
The Queen of Swords lives in each of us and knows exactly when to detach from absolutely everything and retreat. She is the best of thought and air, a mental vacation from all the bullshit, and that aspect of self we turn to when we need clarity. When I am overwhelmed, which is pretty par for the course these days, it’s my Queen of Swords who says, “Come. You’re going to chant now and then you’re going for a walk.” I’d be lying if I said I didn’t fight her advice, I do, but I’m getting better at following it, because it takes me out of the hamster in the wheel thinking that is of virtually no benefit and keeps me locked in futile battles.
To discern is to separate the wheat from the chaff, the lie from the fiction. To discern is to weigh, to judge, and ultimately choose the best course of action. Discernment demands clarity, clarity demands detachment, and your Queen of Swords is your greatest ally. Since I drew the discern card for the week, most of us are going to need to step back from whatever battle we’re fighting. It can be political, it can be a divorce, it can be an errant spouse, a lover whose shelf life is up, the list goes on. Step away from whatever has you wrapped way too tight and come home to self; to your fortress of solitude. In the quiet you will hear what your crystals of wisdom have to tell you. The battle will still be there when you return but it will no longer have the power to suck the life out of you. When it starts to feel like it's sucking the life out of you again, you know from experience what to do.
Probably the best chant for the week’s energy is:
NAM ME OH HO
WREN GAY
KEY OH
I have written the chant exactly as it sounds, not as it’s spelled. It’s a Buddhist chant; my friends and I call it the Tina Turner chant because it’s the one she did that gave her the strength to leave Ike. The chant is enormously soothing and like all chants connects the body, mind, and spirit in right and perfect balance. I use mala beads when I chant. You can get mala’s at most new age stores, pagan stores, and online. Mala’s are like Tibetan rosaries. You hold one bead say the chant, hold the next bead and say the chant, and so on and so on. I chant 4-5 times around the mala. I have another friend who refuses to chant more than once around and still another who is committed to three times around. Clearly this is a personal decision!
When you’ve finished chanting you might want to say:
“The angels bring harmony into my life.”
Good homing dear ones.
Live loud, love fierce, and suffer no fools, Kat
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Weekly Card: 1/30/2017 — PARADISE
"I am Creation, Mighty Creation, and I birthed the Earth into being. The stars and the heavens I birthed; the seas, the lakes all humming life, I birthed. Created by Me out of Me, I live in the Created. I am Creation, Mighty Creation, and I drew the true God from Me. The sun to my moon, Our love is eternity. And I birthed the holy children, Eva and Butcher, the two sides of myself I birthed. I birthed the lovers, spirit wrapped in the sacred flesh of earth, the divine in flesh, flesh divine, soul joy I placed in my garden. Be free, I told my children, learn love. Fill each other and the earth with your light, for you are of the other and the same, but in different form.”
Genesis 2: The Passion of Emma Ray Earle
As a student in an all girls’ Girl’s Episcopal school from the 5th grade through my first two years of college, bible study was as much a part of my education as English and math. When I drew the paradise card what I flashed on was 9th grade bible class with Miss Klein. As per the bible, we’d been thrown out of paradise by God because Adam and Eve ate the apple from the Tree of Knowledge; fruit they were specifically told by God not to eat. This was all Eve’s fault because she’d the one who offered the apple to Adam. I remember thinking, “But he ate it, he had a choice!” Furthermore I didn’t think Eve had done anything wrong. What sane person wouldn’t eat the fruit from the tree of knowledge? Who wanted to walk around dumb? I didn’t say any of that; I’d be killed if I’d said something like that.
I had something called X period after bible class, and I walked down to cafeteria, got myself a Tab and a pack of nabs, and went outside to the woods to eat and sneak a cigarette. I couldn’t shake the idea that we’d been thrown out of paradise because clearly we hadn’t. We lived in paradise and for the life of me I couldn’t understand why people didn’t get that. We had sun, rain, air, water, and fire. We had soil, trees, shrubs, and rocks. We had fish, we had cows, we had chickens; we had deer leaping and rabbits hoping and bison lowing. We had everything we needed, to create everything we had to have, in order to live, and it was freely given. We were born into it.
Nature, the sun, the moon, the ocean, the lakes, the rivers, animals, human beings, the list goes on, none of this was created or invented by man. Mankind did not invent my working miracle of body. My heart beats, my lungs breathe, my mouth salivates, man did not do this. He did, however, in his greed and desire for power and profit, invent everything that creates disease and harms my body. When I did Course of Miracles years ago, I remember a line, (I’m paraphrasing here) that said, Man loves and worships his inventions and his creations before all things. In my book Genesis 2: after Emma has climbed the world’s longest ladder to heaven and is gazing down at her beloved earth, she says: “You couldn’t look at what I was looking at and not get it smack clear that man and his kind always got more important than what he was freely given.” Clearly all that was freely given, Paradise, has been and is under attack by the government.
I was thinking about stress the other day, because I’m under so much of it, and it struck me that all stress is a direct result of the systems that mankind made up; in particular the economy. When I get stressed to the max, I forget I can drive over to the river, and be transported by the light, the air, and birdcall. I forget I can walk outside and feel the alto energy of the mountain massage my being. For me the river and the mountains are paradise. They strengthen, calm, and soothe me, and I am free. The experience of paradise takes me out of the hamster-in-the-wheel thinking that I am prone to when I am feeling powerless. I get a lot of static for saying I feel powerless but I also know by admitting when I feel powerless, and by owning when I feel powerless, I find my power. There are two kinds of power; power over which I call Dick Cheney power, namely the power to make people do what you them too. The other kind of power is the power to impact your world in a way that is of benefit to you and humanity. For that kind of power, you need to root in the earth — in paradise.
In the coming week, try to take a few minutes every day to root. Either sit in a chair, or on the floor, or on the ground. Close your eyes and imagine a root dropping out of the base of your spine and deep into the earth. Now, feel the rich emerald green flowing up through the root and into your body. Contain the energy. (What gasoline is to an engine, earth energy is to your body.) When you’re ready, say: “I commit to protecting the paradise within and around me.” Release the root into the ground and pat yourself all over to make sure you’re back in present time.
I am wishing each of you the experience of paradise. It's right under your feet; you can reach out and touch it.
Live loud, love fierce, and suffer no fools. Kat
GODDESS HEAL MYSTIC FEBRUARY 2017 NEWSLETTER: Musings, magick, specials.
"I am Creation, Mighty Creation, and I birthed the Earth into being. The stars and the heavens I birthed; the seas, the lakes all humming life, I birthed. Created by Me out of Me, I live in the Created. I am Creation, Mighty Creation, and I drew the true God from Me. The sun to my moon, Our love is eternity. And I birthed the holy children, Eva and Butcher, the two sides of myself I birthed. I birthed the lovers, spirit wrapped in the sacred flesh of earth, the divine in flesh, flesh divine, soul joy I placed in my garden. Be free, I told my children, learn love. Fill each other and the earth with your light, for you are of the other and the same, but in different form.”
Genesis 2: The Passion of Emma Ray Earle
As a student in an all girls’ Girl’s Episcopal school from the 5th grade through my first two years of college, bible study was as much a part of my education as English and math. When I drew the paradise card what I flashed on was 9th grade bible class with Miss Klein. As per the bible, we’d been thrown out of paradise by God because Adam and Eve ate the apple from the Tree of Knowledge; fruit they were specifically told by God not to eat. This was all Eve’s fault because she’d the one who offered the apple to Adam. I remember thinking, “But he ate it, he had a choice!” Furthermore I didn’t think Eve had done anything wrong. What sane person wouldn’t eat the fruit from the tree of knowledge? Who wanted to walk around dumb? I didn’t say any of that; I’d be killed if I’d said something like that.
I had something called X period after bible class, and I walked down to cafeteria, got myself a Tab and a pack of nabs, and went outside to the woods to eat and sneak a cigarette. I couldn’t shake the idea that we’d been thrown out of paradise because clearly we hadn’t. We lived in paradise and for the life of me I couldn’t understand why people didn’t get that. We had sun, rain, air, water, and fire. We had soil, trees, shrubs, and rocks. We had fish, we had cows, we had chickens; we had deer leaping and rabbits hoping and bison lowing. We had everything we needed, to create everything we had to have, in order to live, and it was freely given. We were born into it.
Nature, the sun, the moon, the ocean, the lakes, the rivers, animals, human beings, the list goes on, none of this was created or invented by man. Mankind did not invent my working miracle of body. My heart beats, my lungs breathe, my mouth salivates, man did not do this. He did, however, in his greed and desire for power and profit, invent everything that creates disease and harms my body. When I did Course of Miracles years ago, I remember a line, (I’m paraphrasing here) that said, Man loves and worships his inventions and his creations before all things. In my book Genesis 2: after Emma has climbed the world’s longest ladder to heaven and is gazing down at her beloved earth, she says: “You couldn’t look at what I was looking at and not get it smack clear that man and his kind always got more important than what he was freely given.” Clearly all that was freely given, Paradise, has been and is under attack by the government.
I was thinking about stress the other day, because I’m under so much of it, and it struck me that all stress is a direct result of the systems that mankind made up; in particular the economy. When I get stressed to the max, I forget I can drive over to the river, and be transported by the light, the air, and birdcall. I forget I can walk outside and feel the alto energy of the mountain massage my being. For me the river and the mountains are paradise. They strengthen, calm, and soothe me, and I am free. The experience of paradise takes me out of the hamster-in-the-wheel thinking that I am prone to when I am feeling powerless. I get a lot of static for saying I feel powerless but I also know by admitting when I feel powerless, and by owning when I feel powerless, I find my power. There are two kinds of power; power over which I call Dick Cheney power, namely the power to make people do what you them too. The other kind of power is the power to impact your world in a way that is of benefit to you and humanity. For that kind of power, you need to root in the earth — in paradise.
In the coming week, try to take a few minutes every day to root. Either sit in a chair, or on the floor, or on the ground. Close your eyes and imagine a root dropping out of the base of your spine and deep into the earth. Now, feel the rich emerald green flowing up through the root and into your body. Contain the energy. (What gasoline is to an engine, earth energy is to your body.) When you’re ready, say: “I commit to protecting the paradise within and around me.” Release the root into the ground and pat yourself all over to make sure you’re back in present time.
I am wishing each of you the experience of paradise. It's right under your feet; you can reach out and touch it.
Live loud, love fierce, and suffer no fools. Kat
GODDESS HEAL MYSTIC FEBRUARY 2017 NEWSLETTER: Musings, magick, specials.
Weekly Card: 1/16/2017 — BANISH
I am so glad I drew the banishing card on a waning and not a waxing moon, because I’m not quite sure how I would have written about it!
Waxing moon, when the moon grows full, is a time of increase. During a waxing moon, witches do spells to initiate something new and/or bring something new into their lives. After the moon is full, She begins to wane, meaning She grows smaller. During waning moon, witches do spells to release and banish.
I, like most witches, am committed to working with energy currents. If I need money during a waning moon, I will not do a spell for more clients. For me, that’s like body surfing against the wave rather than with it. What I will do is a spell to banish obstacles to opportunities for new clients. The great thing about banishing is it creates space. It’s like weeding and makes room for whatever you want to call in during waxing moon. The magick of waxing and waning moon are perfectly interconnected; each supports, feeds, and strengthens the other, and together they form a sacred whole.
Banishing is not an act of anger or revenge. Like any spell work it is rooted in love. That can be self-love, love of the planet, love of humanity, love of animals, love children, the list goes on. I’ve seen a few off-kilter witches in my day and they’re always going to banish this person or that one because they looked at them funny or they said something nasty about them. They’re running around like the crazed Queen of Hearts only instead of hollering, “Off with her head!” they’re hollering, “I’m going to banish her!” like it’s big, old hairy threat. First off, the magick never works and secondly that’s not what banishing is for. Banishing is not for dealing with dramatic, interpersonal squabbles.
Banishing is an act of change and an act protection. It is very specific. When I was living in Bloomfield, three young men moved into the house next door to me. My bedroom window was on the driveway. The entrance to their apartment was directly across from my window. I went to bed at 11 pm; they got home from work at midnight and the parties started. Drugs, booze, loud music, stupid giggling girls, it was a nightmare. I left a note on their door and asked them politely to keep it down. They were even noisier that night. “She’s just an old bitch who forgot what it was like to be young!” I started sleeping with the air conditioner on but it didn’t matter, you could still hear them. I called the cops who were useless. I left another note, to no avail. I was starting to feel like Newt in Aliens, “They only come at night.” By now the noise was bothering everyone in the building. I called my landlord; she was appalled, and called the landlord of the building where the young men lived. One of the boys (the one I disliked the most) had been thrown out of his father’s house and she was trying to help him. Now, she was sorry she’d ever gotten involved because he hadn’t paid his rent in three months. The situation was rapidly devolving and there was a new crew hanging round that was really sketchy; like lock-your-windows-and-bolt-your-doors kind of sketchy.
My landlord knew I was a witch and she asked if there was something I could do. After yet another night with no sleep because of forty twenty-something’s in the backyard, I said, yes. I created a banishing ritual, stood back, and watched it work. I will never forget the day the landlord showed up with a thug — clearly a made man. They went into the apartment, found 10 people sleeping on the floor, beer bottles everywhere, and overflowing ashtrays. There was no smoking in the house and no more than three people were allowed in the apartment at any given time. In four weeks the young men were gone. Later I heard that two of the guys were busted for breaking into houses.
Banishing, for me in this instance, was a last resort. I’d gone through all the appropriate channels, taken all the appropriate actions, and still, there was no change. The rule of thumb is don’t do a spell when you’re angry, and I couldn’t agree more because when you’re angry you’re not thinking clearly. I define a spell as a living prayer composed of a set series of actions and words. I was not angry when I did the banishing ritual, but I was hard-core done. As ever, I ended the spell, like I end all spells with, “harming none and benefitting all,” and I turned the results over to Lady and Lord. I don’t know how a spell is going to work and I don’t dictate how a spell will work. What I do is set the energy in motion and get out of the way. I very rarely discuss my magick, but because I pulled the banishing card, I am discussing it here. P.S. When a spell works, be it a banishing or any other kind of spell, I don’t go tell it on the mountain.
You can use banishing for personal change and growth and it is extraordinarily effective. For instance, I have client, let’s call her Sandy, (and yes she gave me permission to tell this story) who has had horrific experiences with men. Really, even the ones who start out okay ultimately turn into douche bags. She said, “I want to change this.” I said, “Okay, do a personal inventory of every relationship you’ve ever had all the way back to your father. Don’t rush it,” I cautioned, “take your time.” Three weeks later she called and together, for the next week, we went over the inventory. Ultimately, Sandy uncovered that the issue was abandonment. She was terrified of being abandoned, but because of the way she was raised, she equated abandonment with love. Ergo, she was forever getting involved with men who abandoned her. Though I’m writing this from an intellectual perspective, it’s important that I point out that this was an experiential awakening. She didn’t jump; in our sessions she grappled her way to awareness, to her truth.
Sandy decided to banish her fear of abandonment, which riddled every area of her life, not just her love life. She did the ritual and her entire identity went splat. “I’ve got no fucking idea who I am,” she wailed. “Yet,” I said. “You don’t know who you are yet, but you’re in the process of finding out.” And she did. And no it wasn’t easy; nothing of real value is ever easy. Along the way Sandy chose not to abandon the lonely piece of her when it hit, but rock it in her heart. She said, “You are enough and I love you,” and she also discovered that she’d rather dance alone, than with the wrong person. Yes, she ultimately met a good man, who’s she still with, but it took a few years. She told me she’d never have met him, if she hadn’t done the work she did to become the person she actually was. I agree.
If you do a banishing and you’re still arguing in your head with the person you banished, or had banished by a nice witch, it’s not going to work. If you really want to banish someone from you life, you have to be willing to stop battling them in your head. You have to be willing to stop gossiping about them, with your nearest and dearest. You have to be willing to accept that this person is never going to admit you’re right or that they are at fault in any way. You have to willing to let them think they won. That’s a tall order, but if you’re reading this page, you have brass ovaries and aren’t afraid of trying something new.
So how do you do a banishing? I've used the God Saturn and I've used the God Ganesha. I've used Kali Ma and I've used Hecate. I've also used the Dark Moon Angels. If you're unsure of who to use, you can always call on the Dark Mother. Here is a very simple banishing. You will need a black or navy blue candle, a candle holder, a pasta pot 3/4's full of water, incense, I like dragon's blood but frankincense and myrrh work just fine. Unplug everything and set yourself where you want to work. Fill the pot with water and put the candle holder in the pot. Now, take the candle in your power hand; if you're right handed hold it in your right hand, if you're left handed, hold it in your left hand, and think of feeding what you want to banish into the candle. Let it all go into the candle, if you want to rub the candle over your body or your head, do it. When you've finished, place the candle in the holder in the pot of water before you. Light the candle and say the following, which I have adapted from a spell by Silver Ravenwolf.
At this moment, there is no tomorrow there is no yesterday, there is only this moment.
Dark Mother come to me
I have clothes on my back, food to eat, and a place to stay
Dark Mother come to me
I am perfectly okay
Dark Mother come to me
I am One with the Universe and the Universe provides for me in everyway
Dark Mother come to me
At this moment, there is no tomorrow, there is no yesterday, there is only this moment. I have clothes on my back food to eat and a place to stay. I am perfectly okay, I am One with the Universe and the Universe provides for me in every way. Dark Mother come to me, come to me. This is true as I will and as I say, so mote it be.
In peace
In harmony
In truth
In love.
Dark Mother rain your blessings down upon me
Banish __________ from me now (say it three times)
I am the source of my health and clarity
So mote it be
The candle will burn itself down and ultimately extinguish itself in the water. And the banishing is complete.
Say, "Dark Mother thank you for your presence here. Let me be reborn."
Take the leftover wax, put it in a paper bag, sprinkle sea salt in the bag and shake. Then, throw the bag away, away from house.
I usually do this on a day when I am going to be home, because tapers can take a few hours to burn down into the water. What I do is put the pot of water with the burning candle in it on the stove and leave it there. I always use a pot big enough to fully contain the burning candle. In other words, the candle flame is NO higher than the lip of the pot, so even if it fell over nothing would catch fire. As ever, be sane and exercise caution and do not leave the flame unattended.
“Can we banish Trump?” Someone asked me the other day. And what I heard was, “Banish what he stands for. Set the energy in motion and then give it form.” Marching, organizing, calling your elected official, signing petitions, this gives the banishing energy form. My advice is stay with the facts; don’t get distracted by the bullshit, the mean, the petty, and the lies. Keep the facts front and center.
There will be no card next week as I will be in D.C. at the march, giving form to the banishing essence!
Live loud, love fierce, and suffer no fools. Kat
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For more information on banishing:
Utterly Wicked by Dorothy Morrison (Protection and binding)
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Mercury has gone direct and it's a great time for a reading!
For more information:
I do magical consults; $60 for 30 minutes and $125 for an hour.
Contact me here.
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Sober Witch
Genesis 2: The Passion of Emma Ray Earle
Weekly Card: January 9, 2016 — Sacred Space
It's a week to create sacred space for yourselves, my darlings. Lady knows we need it! When I think of sacred space I think of a place where I can be myself without being attacked; where I can commune with the sacred, and/or be in touch with my divinity. To create sacred space, use the forefinger of your dominant hand, and cut an electric blue circle of protection around yourself. Start facing North. Aim your finger at the floor; the finger is your drawing pen. See/imagine electric blue light coming out of the tip of your finger, as you turn clockwise. When you reach the beginning of the circle knot it with an eternity symbol. An eternity symbol, in case you don’t know, looks like an on-its-side eight.
I learned about cutting circle and creating sacred space from the witches, and in my experience everyone has a different way of doing it. I draw the circle once around, twice around, three times around. Then what I do is face North, and stretch out my arms to the sides, reaching for the edge of the circle with the tips of fingers. The energy from my fingertips catches hold of the energy of the circle and I expand the circle upwards to the heavens and then down to the core of the earth. I end up in a giant crystalline sphere of electric blue. I never asked for crystalline walls or what looks to be purple spider webs threading through the walls. Not that I consciously added either, they’ve just always been there, ever since I started cutting circle.
Once the circle is cut I say something that Scott Cunningham wrote:
Thrice around I’m safe and sound
Evil falls into the ground
I am protected by thy might
O Gracious Goddess, day and night.
What most people don’t know is that each of us carries sacred space, the divine, within. Cutting circle is a way of making it manifest. Circles are like snowflakes; no two are the same. I’ve seen opaque circles, I’ve seen circles made up of razor sharp lines of purple and blue, I’ve seen ice circles, sun circles, lead circles. The only circle that you need to be concerned about though is the circle that lives inside you, just waiting for you to aim your finger at the floor and draw. Don’t worry if you can’t see it at first. I couldn’t see my circle the first three years I drew it, but I took it on faith it was there; just like gravity.
When we create sacred space, we create a realm within the worlds, where we can exhale and be free. Where the cares of the world quite literally roll away. I, like most of the women I know, am actively involved with life, living, and people. I love healing and counseling, I love giving readings, I love helping people uncover who they are, and I love writing, be it soul nurturing, fiction, or politics. I, like most of the women I know, periodically give too much. To keep giving when you’re running on empty does not make you a good person, even though women as a tribe are programmed to believe that. To keep giving when you’re running on empty makes you exhausted and resentful. When you feel exhausted and resentful, it doesn’t mean you’re bad or there’s something wrong with you. It means you need a break; you need sacred space time.
I used to beat myself to a pulp for not recognizing I was feeling like a lunatic because I hadn’t taken any sacred space in entirely too long. In my mind, I should have been aware of the need before it actually raised its pointy-head. I do not think that way now, thank God. We can’t know everything and we’re not supposed to and I am fine with that. This is one of the benefits of being 64.
Before I began actively creating sacred space, I used to bump into it. (I still do and it delights me to no end!) On the beach, the dock on the bay in Lewes, the anti-nuke march in Central Park. The oddest place I ever bumped into sacred space was on the F train. For six months I caught the F train every night at 9:00 p.m., at 14th Street. I always rode in the same car and without fail the car was populated with the same faces. I used to sigh with relief when I got on the train. Diverse as we were, it was down time for everyone there, the in-between of work and the demands of home. As a single mom the demands of home were huge, and I reveled in that half hour on the train, gave over to the deliciousness of not having to “do.” I felt as safe on that train car as I did in my own bedroom.
Sacred space unhooks you from the newsfeed. I am not saying the newsfeed isn’t important, but it’s best to unhook if the newsfeed is controlling you and working your will by its desire. In that space you’re not going to make good decisions; you’re going to get in fights and be mad at the wrong people, and your perspective is going to be off. There is no right, no prescribed, way to use sacred space. Sometimes I cry hysterically, sometimes I simply lay my head down. I’ve grieved in sacred space; taught classes in sacred space. I have felt my totem animals curl around me, the floor vibrate with Ganesha’s dancing, and knew light to be planted in my heart. I’ve also had nothing out of the ordinary happen, but when I came out of it knew the peace that passes all understanding. One night I remember I was just too darned tired to cut circle, even though I knew I desperately needed some sacred space time. So what I did was sit in a comfy chair and light a candle. I inhaled nice and deep, exhaled, and imagined a circle around me. Then I just sat there and relaxed.
The point is you create sacred space anywhere you want to; you can physically cut circle, or you can image a circle, around a room, a chair, an entire apartment, your backyard, etc. You do have to take the circle down when you’re done. If you imagined the circle going up around you, simply imagine it dissolving into earth. Say, “Turn to return, fade to grow,” give yourself a hug and say, “Mine is.” If you drew the circle, you undo the eternity symbol knot with your drawing finger and turn counter-clockwise drawing the electric blue line back into your finger. Turn as many times counterclockwise, as you turned clockwise, when you were cutting the circle. When you’re done you say, “May the energy in this room turn to return and fade to grow. Thank-you.” Then give yourself a hug and say, “Mine is.”
I want each of you to know, that as a woman you are many things, but first and foremost you are a divine creatura; sacred and magical. Patriarchal culture, in particular the religions that spawned and support it, has done everything it possibly could to blind us to the truth of our being. Over the last forty years, I have watched women, across the country and the world come into their truth, and along the way we changed the law. Consistent resistance and organization changed the law. The Republicans currently in power, and without checks or balances, are hell bent on sending women back to the dark ages, and the women who support Trump are colluding with them. What this means is that there is polarization, two distinct sides, within the tribe women; women who collude with patriarchy and women who don’t. At the same time, throughout recorded history, there has been never been any lasting social change without polarization. Stand in your truth; speak words to power, stay out of stupid, futile arguments, and love beyond all reason. Take breaks in the battle. Create sacred space alone, and with the sisters of resistance, and draw strength from the divine within and around you.
Live loud, love fierce, and suffer no fools. Kat Manaan
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GODDESS HEAL MYSTIC SERVICES!
“Seven rays of rainbow light exploded through the ground. The light entered the feet and filled the bodies of all the Wild Women and Magick Men dreaming humanity’s dream, and the dimming hold of the Omnipotent Hornless God, the oil slick cloak, exploded off the people and the earth. And I saw for the first time what could be, in the true and mighty colors of earth and her people revealed; vivid and vibrant as the colors in my first book, only giant-sized.” Genesis 2: The Passion of Emma Ray Earle.
Weekly Card: 1/2/2016 - Courage
I was thinking about the cowardly lion when I drew this card. The cowardly lion, who had the best courage of all, courage of the heart, and didn’t even know it.
When I think of courage, I think of going emotionally where other’s fear to tread. I think of asking the difficult questions. I think of allowing self to not know and living in the unfinished. I think of reclaiming the pieces of self and soul that have been splintered off by life. I think of commitment to one’s authenticity and I think of the work it takes to get there. I think of treating self with tenderness and compassion, touching the divine within and around you, and the delicious sense of being actively engaged with life and living. “What about the general leading his troops to battle?” A friend of mine asked, when I told him what the card for the week was. “Isn’t that courage?” “It is,” I said, “but I’m focusing on emotional courage right now, which I tend to think of as the last unexplored frontier.”
In most women’s lives there is a wake-up call, usually quite painful, that launches them onto the path of self-discovery. It can be a relationship, getting fired, a betrayal of some kind, severe depression, loneliness, the list goes on. Wake-up calls show us where we’ve been colluding with our own oppression; wake-up calls show us where we’ve been programmed to keep ourselves small; wake-calls can lead us to a core belief system that we are unconscious we have. I’ve been working with women for over 30 years and they are hair trigger quick to judge themselves wrong. Wrong usually masquerades as, “What’s the lesson here?” But, overwhelming feelings or intense difficulties are not about lessons at all. They’re about the feelings, the feelings are the point, and having those feelings takes tremendous courage.
It’s easy to feel your love and joy and good times, but your hate, your jealously, your resentful, is not so easy because we’re programmed to believe those feelings make us bad people. But they don’t make us bad people, they’re part of being human, and every time you slice away, split off, from that which makes you human, you weaken the humane. I am not suggesting you act out on the so-called ugly feelings, but I am suggesting you feel and explore them. I know you have the courage to do it. Pull a thread of the ugly and trace it back to the unconscious belief system where it comes from. Try not to be to linear about the trace because the path tends to be quite twisty. Every feeling has right use and you may find you need some of that ugly for drawing boundary or confronting someone/something that needs to be confronted. Keeping in mind that the purpose of life is to evolve, exploring, feeling your feelings, is one of the ways we evolve into our humanity, through our humaneness. Inclusiveness of other(s) begins with self and soul.
There’s a difference between blame and holding responsible. When I think of blame, I think of an active finger pointing battle. There is no power to change in blame and blaming, it’s a closed loop, but it’s still a vital and necessary part of recovery, because what’s underneath it is the battle to remain unaware and the refusal to accept what’s happened. Once you can own and accept what happened, blame gives way to holding responsible; accepting so and so, or they, did this and this is how it impacted you. Now, you have the power to begin the process of real change and you got that power by going through the feeling process, not by jumping to what's-the-lesson here. Skipping over the feelings denies the power, the learning, and resulting wholeness intrinsic to the feelings that you’re having. The courage to have one’s feelings, to explore, to feel, to dive in, to look under rocks you think you shouldn’t, this is the courage I see in my beloved clients and friends.
If there were a word to describe the upcoming 2017, it would be courage. Every woman reading this page is going to find new reservoirs of courage within her in relation to the world, her own life, and loved ones. You are going to be unapologetically expressing yourself. Keeping in mind the micro (you) reflects the macro (the world) part of this is being triggered by Trump winning the election. The shadow of patriarchy has come into full power and Kali Yuga is upon us. After the election I curled in on myself, like a leech sprinkled with salt. Because of my recent meditations, I'm starting to come out of it. When I close my eyes, what I see are rays of spectacular radiance cutting through the grotesque, the rays originate inside the grotesque, and what I hear is that I am watching the birth of unity consciousness.
Unity consciousness is rooted in the humane. Unity consciousness recognizes that we are all in this together and together, and only together, can we make the needed changes. Unity consciousness is the defeat of us versus them and will force a review of the purpose of government, the economy, and how we live. Daunting in scope and size, unity consciousness is the difference between the ideal of mankind and the reality of humanity. Every human being who is on the path to becoming conscious, and living from her authenticity, what I call the honest self, is part of unity consciousness. As I wrote earlier, inclusiveness of other(s) begins with self and soul.
Courage is of the heart and the heart is about love; courage then is an act of love. In this New Year, I am wishing each of you the courage to take a stand for the sacred human being you are. You are the water and the water protector. Refuse to budge from the process of self-discovery. You are mining for the truth and wonder of you, that was buried by life and living. Give yourself the gift of your own authenticity and let your radiance shine. Commit to not judging yourself. If you are continually coming up lacking in your own eyes, then that against which you're judging yourself, (all judgement is a result of comparison), is dysfunctional. Right use of judgement is discernment, of love, by love, and for love.
I would like to take a moment to thank each of you for allowing me to continue to do the work that I do. Happy, happy New Year, my beloved Goddess Heal Mystic family. I am wishing you loud courage, love beyond all reason, great good humor, and snark when you need it. May we destroy the illusions and tainted belief systems that keep us cut to size and manageable.
Live loud, love fierce, and suffer no fools. Kat
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Goddess Heal Mystic Services
Soul Readings
I am on the planet to help people live true to self and soul. I am on the planet to help people uncover who they are, live from that authenticity, and know love beyond all reason. Soul readings, a delicious blend of the psychic, the Jungian, and Goddess teachings are the result.
I look under the issues, to the feelings, and to what is creating the reality, that has you so confused and/or you want to change. I will ask you questions: what themes are replaying over and over, what do you love, what do you want most in your life? These are the questions that have to be answered if you want change in your world. Knowing self is power and right use of power, to create and impact your life, is love made visible.
I am a wide open channel for healing, teaching, and guidance, and work with whatever tools are needed for the reading. Tarot, astrology, numerology, past lives, Spirit guides, angels, the Fey, the dead, Patron Gods and Goddesses. The tools I use in any given reading are determined by Spirit.
I may not always tell you what you want to hear, but I will lovingly tell you the truth, help you get out from under the critical voices in your head, and explain your best course of action and the practical and magical steps to get you there.
I do readings at home, by phone, and by Skype.
Please be advised that all first time readings are done on phone
or by Skype unless you have been referred to me by a long term client.
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Payment is due before the reading.
30 Minutes = $65 45 minutes = $95 60 Minutes = $135
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Wise Woman Counseling - Life Coaching
I work with a number of people who are on sacred paths — committed to living their myth and authenticity. There is a process to this kind of living and Wise Woman counseling - life coaching addresses what comes up during this process. What you like, what you don't like; what you can and can't change; ever evolving perspective and perceptions; grief, ecstasy, rage, and everything in-between. I can help you find out who you are and help you to reel in your projections. I can help you determine the most practical and beneficial, emotional, mental, and spiritual choices for you in the moment, and the right and perfect chants, prayers, affirmations, and spells to support your choices. I am about supporting the humane in a human being. If a choice isn't humane than it's not spiritual.
Mystic Counseling/Life Coaching is face to face, either at my home, on Skype, or FaceTime.
I do take Paypal. All Paypal transactions are $5 more.
Payment is due before the session.
30 Minutes = $70. 60 Minutes = $135. 3 one hour sessions = $375.
5 one hour sessions =$625. 10 one hour sessions = $1200.
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"You couldn’t look at what I was seeing and not get it smack clear that man so loved what he’d made, what he’d thought up, he flat-out ignored what he’d been freely given. Maybe Mankind started off nice, I didn’t know and I really didn’t care. All I knew was it’d outlived its usefulness with its my-cock-is-bigger-’n-yours ways.” Genesis 2: The Passion of Emma Ray Earle
Weekly Card - 12/26/2016 - Community
When I think community, I think life sustaining, listening and being heard, knowing I’m not alone, being loved and loving back. I think of my closest friends and my circle of home. That’s one kind of community. I think of the readers of this page, who take the time to write me, as another kind of community. Still another kind of community is the community of resistance that I am part of, composed of disparate human beings, all shapes colors sexualities and creeds, who are putting aside their personal differences in order to resist Trump. I honestly don’t know if we can stop Trump because Republicans control the house, senate, executive branch, and soon the judiciary, but I do know we can engage in the highly visible process of resistance. I do know that we the people can make the kind of noise that will reverberate throughout the United States and the world. Someone said to me, “But what’s it matter if you can’t win?” I answered truthfully. “I can’t explain why it matters, I just know it does.”
Entirely too often spirituality is used to remove us from reality. My example of reality is, if you throw yourself in front of the speeding bus, you will die. I got into spirituality and the new age because I knew there was something other than what was visible to the naked eye, and I was in a great deal of pain. When I discovered chanting and meditating I was ecstatic. As long as I could chant and meditate, I felt so good it didn’t matter what was happening in my world or the world at large, and I could stay positive. Back in those days it was all-important to stay positive because that’s how I was taught to create a better world for myself and others. Some 35 years later, I know that staying positive is ridiculously overrated, does not create a better world, and though it can help you through some pretty dark times, I have found that being in the dark of my feelings is of way more benefit to me as a conscious woman, living as a bridge between the worlds, and dedicated to my evolution.
In our daily lives, community asks us on a regular basis to step up to the plate for others and ourselves. As a sober woman, I am part of a community that reaches out its hand to the still suffering alcoholic. As a mom, I was part of a community of mothers who met once a week for play date in Riverside Park. Together we taught our children to share, we taught our children to use their voices, not their fists, and we taught our children that the Park belonged to all of us. Being a member of a community is a choice. When we choose to be part of the community of resistance, we step up to the plate for democracy. The long game is a much needed and long overdue redefinition of government — namely, what is the purpose of government? The short game is making sure it goes down in recorded history, that we, the people, organized against the men in power, and the women colluding with them, who are firmly committed to an economic system that is destroying the environment and humanity for the sake of profit. Someone asked me, “What’s it matter how you much you organize and march if you can't possibly win?” To which I answered truthfully, “I don’t know yet; I just know it matters.”
Nothing kills community faster than divisiveness; at the same time the goal of community can be weakened by inclusiveness. Fox in the hen house anyone? Someone said to me that I needed to see Trump supporters’ side of things and make compromises for the good of the country. Let me be clear. I have no desire to kill, harm, or maim Trump supporters in any way; at the same time I am not going to make a compromise with someone who thinks “drill baby drill,” is a good idea, supports the concept of trickle down economics, thinks women have no right to determine what to do with their bodies, and blames people of color, immigrants, trannies, feminists, minorities, gays, trannies. and libtards for destroying the country. In order to make that compromise, I would have to accept the validity of an argument that has no validity. For me to accept the argument, I would have to normalize the abnormal.
We’re programmed to normalize the abnormal. That’s religion. When man and his kind support and worship a God who lets the people kill his son to prove to them how much he loves them, there’s something off. I might be more inclined to favor this God, if he let the people kill him, if he sacrificed himself, in order to protect his son. Since I refuse to accept utterly inane arguments as valid, political, personal, or religious, I am contributing to the polarization, the deep divide, in America. You are part of the problem someone told me, but I don’t think so. Colluding with evil perpetuates evil. To take it out of the political for a moment, an abused woman who doesn’t leave her husband for the sake of her children, is colluding with evil and setting her children up to become abused and abusers. When the abused woman reels back and cries, “No more!” her action throws a cherry bomb into her family’s world. Deep divides are the result. Deep divides are part of any profound and healing change. The woman finds community among other women, who have been through the same thing; women who understand what she’s going through and who support her. That community becomes a safety net for other women who have the courage to cry, “No more!”
Historically there has never been social change without polarization. Keeping in mind that the micro, (you), reflects the macro, (the world), and vice versa, any great change you experience is going to be polarizing on some level. The opposites in you are going to rear their hydra heads, and bite at each other, and it’s decidedly uncomfortable. This experience is a working piece of what it means to be alive and sane, even though there’s a part of you that thinks you’re probably losing your mind. Psyche is your best friend and she polarizes when a change needs to be made. The choice before you is ultimately an opportunity to live authentically. To live authentically is to serve soul — what I define as the sacred feminine, an eternal piece of the divine within you that reincarnates from lifetime to lifetime. Truly serving soul is an act of love though it is often spun, especially for women, as an act of selfishness.
Righteous anger is born of love. That is what the newly forming community of resistance is about; love of planet, country, and humanity. Effective, supportive communities, be they political or personal, are first and foremost rooted in love, and stretch us to love even more. Love does not deny the existence of hate. If you don’t acknowledge hate, you’ll miss the traps the hateful set, meant to distract and ensnare you, in futile arguments where you are defending self/soul/point of view to someone who will never see your side, no matter what you say, even when you're absolutely right. Step around the traps, stay with the goal, personal or political, that is of love, by love, and for love.
In the coming New Year, I am wishing each of you a community where you are seen, heard, and understood. I am wishing you the courage to listen to your intuition, act on your instincts, defend what needs to be defended, and neither close the door, nor leave it open, to the hate that threatens to destroy us all. I am wishing each of you a deep sense of belonging, love beyond all reason, and great, good humor. Refuse to let the hateful destroy the beauty. Refuse to give up joy when it comes your way. Refuse to curb the depth of your love and dismiss the validity of your feelings. Hold strong to those you love and who love you. The people united can never be divided.
Live loud, love fierce, and suffer no fools. Kat
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I am doing soul readings for 2017 throughout January. Click here for more information
12/12/16 Weekly Card – Bridge – Connect
The etymology of the word religion is religios, meaning to re-link. Given the etymology, religion must have originally been about re-linking to the world. I grew up in a staunchly, Christian household and attended all girls episcopal schools from the 5th grade though my second year of college. Bible study, chapel, and Sunday church were as much a part of my life as brushing my teeth and it was never about re-linking with the world. It was about unlinking from the world, namely the desires of the flesh, and linking up with all that was holy good, namely God, by taking his son to be my savior. “Y’all are sinners!” The minister bellowed, one Sunday, pointing his finger directly at me. I heard a voice in my head — it was my voice, only old — say, “He’s got it all wrong.” The idea that “they” had and have it all wrong never left me.
In the early 80’s, I threw myself into the budding New Age and gave life and will over to the transcendent experience. It was my first experience, other than tripping my brains out, of a direct connection to the divine. I remember sitting in front of the channel, dissolving into tears of gratitude; I remember saying I knew it, I knew this existed; I remember wondering how I was supposed to use this energy. Ultimately, I would find New Age teaching to be as tyrannical as the Christianity I grew up with. There was no room for feeling, all of my feelings. There was only room for positive. Happy, joyous, and positive were good; anger, sadness, jealousy, ware bad. If you felt angry, you were supposed to affirm yourself and say, I am happy. If you were jealous you were supposed to say, I bless her prosperity, or path, or good fortune, etc. In other words I was supposed to deny my feeling, rise above my feelings, and by affirming myself I would create something new. Sounds good in theory doesn’t it? But in reality this is akin to stitching up a wound before you’ve cleaned it out.
What you do when you deny a feeling, rise above a feeling, or split off from the feeling is abandon a piece of you. This piece of you, of self, is then pushed into shadow where it continues to grow and fester, and will eventually begin to control your behavior. My guides have told me repeatedly there is no such as a negative feeling; it is our judgment of them that gives them their sting. I would like to add to that, that there IS such a thing as a negative action, when we act out on a feeling in a way that harms others. Voting for Trump is a classic example of an act of rage. People were and are rightfully, over-the-top enraged at the way Washington conducts business; so enraged they were blind to the false reasoning, and false promises of a pathological narcissist, remarkably similar to the God of my childhood, who let people kill his son to prove how much he loved them. People are socialized/programmed to look for the savior, whether its God, Jesus, the Buddha, Allah, etc. They are not taught that they are their own saviors because that would pretty much destroy organized religion and the trillions of non-taxable dollars it brings in a year.
That we need to be saved, that another human being or a God can and will save us, is part of a toxic belief system integral to the culture and rooted in the fake fall from grace shared by organized religion. The most powerful socializing force in the world is religion; even atheism wouldn't exist if there wasn't such an overwhelming belief in God. When we choose the path of consciousness, we choose to get out from under the belief systems of the culture and find our own, and in so doing we begin the process of re-linking with who and what we really are. It is not by unlinking from my dark, chaotic self that allows me an ever-deepening connection to the divine; it is by re-linking with that part of me. For the witch the divine lives within and the Goddess contains all, not just the easily digestible. As a witch if I sit with a feeling, any feeling, long enough I will find right use for that feeling. The power to create, with which we were all born, is in right use of the feeling. Every time you deny, repress, or split off from a feeling, you are disempowering yourself. Right use of power is love made visible; to disempower yourself is to rob yourself of the ability to love and be loved as deeply as possible.
I love the concept of building bridges, of linking one side to another, but what is left out in the more idealistic discussion of bridge building, is the need for commonality of purpose. Politically, it is impossible for me to build a bridge with Trump supporters and the Republican Party because I am intimate with their anti-women’s, anti-climate, anti-LGBT, anti-social security, anti-single payer medical insurance, anti-union, anti-minimum wage, plateform. Like bone, I am appropriately and perfectly rigid in my resistance and I will not engage in bad compromise, namely crumbs for humanity from the corporate-owned and run table. Bad political compromise is simply colluding with the oppressor and destructive to the collective soul. From a human standpoint, a bad bridge and bad compromise is every bit as destructive to the individual soul. A woman I knew was encouraged to build a bridge with her abusive ex-husband. The person relaying the story to me, clearly thought this was the height, the absolute pinnacle, of spirituality. I disagreed. “What was the point of building a bridge to her abuser? Wouldn’t it make more sense to build bridges to other abused women to fight for change?” Left out of the more idealistic discussion of building bridges is commonality of purpose. I had an enormously talented and gifted client who was working for a man who clearly didn’t like her. We all have that experience at some point in our lives; we work for someone who doesn’t like us, even if we’re doing the best fucking job in the entire world. Attempting to build a bridge (and the woman in question was really trying) to that kind of person is an exercise in futility. He wasn’t going to let her get ahead and he was hamstringing her every step. On top of this, the culture she grew up in socialized her to believe that, Ph.d or not, she wasn’t as good as a man.
In our coaching session I focused on first things first: this wonderful talented woman had to re-claim the piece of herself that felt she wasn’t as good as a man. She had to begin the process of re-linking with who she really is, not with what the culture told her she was. I then suggested she read, “What Color is Your Parachute.” There is no better book to help you package and re-package your talents. Magick followed: a spell to get the right and perfect job: one that utilized all her talents, working with people she respected, and who respected her. Now, she has a great job working with people who absolutely respect her, in an the area she was interested in all along, which was not the area she was working in under the douche bag. She’s also in a consciousness raising group, building bridges with other women whose commonality of purpose is to teach the children, boys and girls, that men are not superior to women. The whole process took her about 6 months. Process is rarely immediate.
As bridge is the card of the week, connection and connecting is the theme. To fully connect with another, with life, you must first connect with self. Honor self, warts and all. Say outloud: "I honor myself, all of me." Say: "I love myself beyond all reason. Say: "I respect myself." As you commit to the process of honoring, loving, and respecting self, you will find you have less and less patience for the people who suck the light out of you, and you will engage with these psychic vampires, less and less. This will make room for the people with whom you actually have something in common; people whose commonality of purpose, life, and living, is simpatico with yours. That, my darlings, is where you build the bridge. If you're looking for a savior, look in the mirror and then look to the people with whom you are building bridges. Together you may not change the world, but you will certainly make an impact that will reverberate through history.
Live loud, love fierce, and suffer no fools. Kat
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I am taking on new clients beginning January, 2017, for Woman Wild Counseling and Life Coaching. Click here and scroll down the page.
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THIS MONTH'S SPECIALS AT GODDESS HEAL MYSTIC
READINGS are on special for the month of December, As of January 1st, 2017, this special is over. If you'd like to buy a discounted reading in December to use later, you can. BUT, you have to use the discounted reading by January 31st, 2017. My availability is not as wide open as it used to be, due to my other job. Saturday's and Sundays are now best for me.
An hour reading is $100 rather than $145.
A half-hour reading is $60 rather than $70.
All paypal payments are $5 more.
Gift Certificates for the holidays are available. They are good through May, 2017. After that they are null and void.
Gift Certicate prices:
Hour readings = $135
1/hour readings = $65
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Card of the Week: 12/5/2016 — Defend
"You ever seen the stillbirth of the Evil Oil Man’s world? It looks, sounds, and smells exactly like the nuthouse multiplied by about a billion; only the nuthouse looks like a giant high rise in New York City. The building’s been stuffed to bursting and the sides are bent out and splitting open. Every color and every sex of human and animal inside is spilling out, screaming. They’re falling, writhing piles of people, beating and hating on each other, and it almost kills you to watch. It was just as hard to watch the bliss addicts, stepping on top the piles of people on the ground, even piles of children, and babies, keeping themselves blind to the stillbirth; like none of it was even a part of their lives. A ray of sun hit, and I seen a thin cloak of oil, glistening like a dead rainbow, hooked into the shiny dark under the surface, holding it all together." Genesis 2: The Passion of Emma Ray Earle
Hello my darlings,
I am moved and happily ensconced on the first floor of a white farmhouse in a sweetly eccentric town in the Hudson Valley. I've been so busy with the move, it's been awhile since I've dreamed or thought of anything thing else. Not so this morning, when I woke up thinking that each of us is a symphony and we are bringing our music together to create an entirely new song. Never has this been more important than right now because the old spiritual axioms no longer hold in the coming reality in which we now find ourselves. Like most of the people I know and work with, I was gutted by Drump’s win, and scared. I’ve felt that way for a while now. The other day when I went for a walk, I ran into a friend on the corner of Church and Park. She was speaking with a man who aggressively and adamantly insisted that I take an action, “Right Now!” in order to undo the fear I was experiencing, and remind myself that I was powerful. I nodded, said, “Hmmmm,” and didn’t engage. Being a sane and conscious woman, I am not going to take an action when I am lost in the murk of my own sense of powerlessness and my judgment is off. I was still reeling from the election. The world as I know it is about to be destroyed to fulfill the insatiable need of profit, and the greedy men whose only power is their profit, at the expense of the humane, humanity, and the planet. I prefer staying with the truth of my feelings no matter how uncomfortable. I know that experiencing my powerlessness will lead me to my power.
I have been writing about the embodied sacred for over 30 years. I also write lefty, progressive politics and I know exactly what it means to have a Republican Congress, Senate, Executive Branch, and (soon) the Judiciary. I am intimate with the Republican agenda re: climate, women, LGBT, religion, education, etc, and it’s not pretty. Thinking positive thoughts is not going to change the Republican agenda. Only concrete, focused action can do that, and though I am not optimistic that we’re going to win, we are not going down without a fight; without making our voices heard, and in so doing we are modeling right use of resistance for future generations. That’s what I was thinking about when I drew this week’s card; Defend.
Like anger, defending and being defensive, gets a bad rap, which I find enormously irritating. If you are having a feeling that makes you uncomfortable, a so-called bad/negative feeling, you sit with it till you figure out right use of the feeling. Choosing right use of a feeling is where your power to create your world lies. Nothing can take away your power to create; this, however, does not mean your creations won’t be destroyed.
The Dakota Access Pipeline is a powerful example of right use of defending. The DAPL is a blatant violation of Native American treaty rights and directly threatens their drinking water, burial grounds, and the sacred sites of the Standing Rock Sioux. The protestors don’t call themselves, “protestors,” they call themselves “water protectors.” In my experience intrinsic to right use of defending and being defensive is the quality of protection.
Women and some men have a horrific time defending themselves, even when they’re right, for fear of being called defensive. Like there’s something wrong with you for defending self, soul, and what you hold dear; for protecting your water and your land. A righteous defense draws a boundary, the two sides, yours and theirs, become quite evident and confrontation ensues. Honest confrontation, like judgment, is as much a part of life as gravity. Implicit in taking a stand is the idea that you have weighed the facts, and made a decision accordingly. Whether you are leaving a job, a marriage, changing your lifestyle, your diet, your friends, any choice involves judgment. And if and when an external or even internal (battle with self) confrontation ensues, work on loving the battle as much as the ease. Loving the battle is about trusting in what you hold true so strongly you’re willing to put yourself out there and fight for what you want, without debilitating self-criticism, and without caring what other people think. Getting to that point is a long and truly worthwhile process, and begins with the daily repetition of: “I love the battle as much as the ease.” Say it and let it go. In the coming weeks, the words will begin to reveal their meaning in a way that is specific to you, that resonates and makes sense to you.
As I look ahead to the upcoming battles for humanity and the planet, I come back to the idea that we are all symphonies bringing our music together to create an entirely new song. We may have to compromise certain notes, and even whole movements, in order to reach our goal of humanity and the planet first but we will never compromise the goal itself. The micro (you) reflects the macro (the world.) In the upcoming weeks then, be careful where and how you choose to compromise. Defend and protect your dreams and desires; call upon the dragon for courage, and use your shield to bounce away the slings and arrows of others. Refuse to compromise in order to keep the peace. Pease at any price is no peace at all.
Live loud, love fierce, and suffer no fools. Kat
P.S. I just read that the Army Corps of Engineers have halted the pipeline! This is what we are capable of doing when we come together.
P.S.S. The affirmation for the week: I love the battle as much as the ease.
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Specials at Goddess Heal Mystic
Readings are on special for the month of December, As of January 1st, 2017, this special is over. If you'd like to buy a discounted reading in December to use later, you can. BUT, you have to use the discounted reading by January 31st, 2017. My availability is not as wide open as it used to be, due to my other job. Saturday's and Sundays are now best for me.
An hour reading is $100 rather than $145.
A half-hour reading is $60 rather than $70.
All paypal payments are $5 more.
Gift Certificates for the holidays are available. They are good through May, 2017. After that they are null and void.
Gift Certicate prices:
Hour readings = $135
1/hour readings = $65
Wise Woman counseling and life coaching remains the same price!
Have a great week my darlings. x0xx0 Kat
Card of the Week: 11/12/2016 - Insight
(My spirituality infuses my politics, so if you’re looking for something that has nothing to do with politics or the election you might want to skip reading me this week.)
The etymology of the word religion is religios, which means re-linking. Religion then, in its purest sense, is a means of re-linking to the world around us. Most religious and spiritual practices are about separating from the world in order to become more spiritual. This has never made any sense to me because to be truly spiritual, you have to be dead — without a body. Since the election I have been bombarded with bumper sticker exhortations to stay positive, light filled, and loving. Don’t let hate win, I hear over and over. But hate did win; and it bothers me a lot, and I am going to have an emotional response to it. I feel angry, upset, gutted (take your pick) and scared. The fact that Republicans now control the house, the senate, the executive branch, and as soon as Trump is sworn into office and appoints a justice to the supreme court, the judiciary, means there are literally no checks and balances to the racist, xenophobic, anti-woman, anti-environment, anti-LGBT, Republican agenda, with the exception of a senate filibuster.
Someone wrote me and said that I didn’t know what was going to happen, and by imagining what would happen, I was energetically setting up the reality, and rejecting any possible good, that could come out of it. I do not subscribe to this way of thinking. One, I know exactly what’s going to happen because I have been writing politics for over 20 years and am intimately familiar with Republican policy, government, and how it works. Two, If I hadn’t accepted I was an alcoholic, I would not, could not, have gotten sober. If women hadn’t accepted the reality that they were treated like second-class citizens, the entire suffrage movement would never have happened. If humanity hadn’t accepted the fact the environment was being destroyed by chemicals and fossil fuels, the environmental movement would have never have happened. The point is once we accept our reality, the facts, where we are, what we’re about etc., then and only then can we effect real change. Creating anything in order to rise above and ignore the reality does little more than increase the split within, between the so-called spiritual (good) self and the mundane (bad) self, and thrusts the feeling reality, which has been deemed negative/wrong, into shadow, where it will continue to fester and grow. Just what we need — more fucking “other.” So-called hateful Trump people over here and more spiritual-than-thou over there. Both sides are opposite points on the same pole, made up out of the exact same ingredients, and the worst of each lives in the shadow of the other.
I do not hate Trump or his supporters but I hate what they stand for. I’ve been told repeatedly that hate is not the opposite of love. I disagree. I think hate is the opposite of love. Nothing lays waste to beauty more completely than hate, and nothing creates and supports beauty more powerfully than love. Everything contains its opposite, not in terms of opposing, but in terms of compliment; therein lays the balance, the strength, and the power to create. Split off from the opposite of anything, and you weaken its benefit and purpose. My hate and my rage for everything Trump and his followers’ support is rooted in my deep and abiding love for humanity and the planet. What I’m working on right now is containing my love and my hate and my rage and my peace. As I write this, I can feel them all pressing and grinding against each other; It hurts like hell, and I have the kind of pressure in my heart, that virtually nothing can relieve, except time. I know from past experience that the pressure, the grinding of the opposites against each other, will ultimately create new emotional ground and that this new place of being will be my foundation for right action.
The guides once told me there was no such as a negative feeling; it is our judgment of them that gives them their sting. There are however negative actions, meaning hate-filled actions, which are rooted in terror and fear, and egregiously harm other people. I do not support hate-filled actions. I never have. I support, I teach, I encourage, people to have their true feelings (no matter how ugly) and through holding its opposite. find right use for them. Having the so-called ugly feelings DOES NOT CREATE YOUR REALITY; splitting off from them does, because the feeling is thrust in shadow, repressed, where it will continue to fester and grow and become the lens through which you view life. If you’re having a feeling, you have a damned good reason to have it. Feelings are not facts; feelings are a barometer of what’s going on with you.
I respect the democratic process with every fiber of my being but I do not respect the present outcome and have no intention of making nice. (Bernie put it best; he is perfectly willing to work with Trump, but will stand up against the “discriminatory and inflammatory” things he’s said and the “un-American policies,” he has proposed.) This does not mean that I am going to bomb Trump supporters, kill them, declare war on the Midwest, or take a Louisville slugger to the car windows of those who disagree with me. Hate filled actions such as these are rooted in powerlessness, where power is defined as having power (control) over someone or something. I call that mutant power. I define power as the ability to impact, to affect a thing, to my benefit and the benefit of the tribe of humanity. For that power to be as strong and clear as it possibly can, I must have the courage to have all my feelings, to contain my opposites, and commit to standing on the new ground forming, that supports and is ever shaping my truth and my expression of that truth.
I must also have the courage to speak to a tyrannical spirituality that insists God/Goddess put Trump in office for us to learn. Like Big Momma got together with Big Poppa in the sky and they decided, “The children need to learn this.” In other words it really doesn’t matter what you do because Big Momma and Big Poppa can change the game whenever they want, for your own good. I guess that’s what’s behind the holocaust, slavery, 9/11, and women being herded into rape camps. God and Goddess wanted us to learn something at the horrifying expense and excruciating pain of others. I do not subscribe to this definition of God/Goddess/ and I absolutely reject the idea that a God/Goddess exists to teach us lessons for evolutionary purposes. Not only does it reek of poisonous pedagogy, it’s a watered down version of the power over God of the bible. It’s also a way people avoid owning their power. God made me do it, or God’s doing it. At the same time I have experienced grace on numerous occasions, as a result of my deep work with Lady and Lord, and I know what it is to co-create with the divine. The frequency of my soul evolves because of that work and is what attracts those to me with compatible frequency, who I can really help. I also know for fact I have help from the divine, from the invisible, when I ask for it, and that help helps me to take the actions I need to take. When I connect with the divine within, I open the channel to my connection with divine all around me.
The divine, my God, my Goddess, are the life force that threads through and animates all of nature. They are the cycles of life, death, and rebirth. They are the change of seasons, the tides, gravity, the sun, the moon, mountain, valley, wide open plain, ocean, leaf and bud. They are hurricanes, tsunamis, floods, earthquakes, and forest fires. The Lady and the Lord contain everything, not just the easily digestible, and each of us contain the Lady and Lord. Kahil Gibran once wrote, what is hate but tortured good? I loved that because one, he acknowledged hate existed, and two, he recognized its connection to something beautiful.
Humanity and the environment have been dealt a devastating blow by people whose opinions have been manipulated and programmed by experts. The dumbing down of America, patriarchy, and right wing Christianity were and are the carrier systems. And it’s all of, by, and for profit, no matter who or what gets destroyed, and yes the powers that be behind all of this, (the Koch Brothers) know exactly what they’re doing. But, in my meditation today I saw seeds of light and I saw lines of light from those seeds reaching tentatively towards other seeds. I will not shape the essence of what I saw with a new age platitude such as, holding space for change or being positive, because that’s not what this is about. That’s not what’s happening. Spirituality, and what it means, is in the process of being redefined because the axioms of the new age no longer hold in the new reality we are facing. Part of that re-defining will be a result of holding the opposites and the alchemical change that will ensue. What love means is going to deepen as people begin to re-link to the earth, self, soul, and each other, with eyes wide open and without rose-colored glasses.
In the meantime my darlings pull close to your loved ones; grieve, howl, laugh, do whatever you need to do. So many people of like mind are reading this right now and we are family. You are not alone; I am not alone; we are in this together. I am hugging all of you.
Live loud, love fierce, and suffer no fools. Kat
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HOLIDAY SPECIALS WILL BE POSTED NEXT WEEK!
For services click here.
Card of the Week: 11/7/2016 Woman Wild
Someone once asked me why I called my cards the Woman Wild Oracle rather than the Wild Woman Oracle. I said the woman in woman wild is an adjective, not a noun. It describes a kind of wildness intrinsic to women, individually and collectively, that patriarchy has done everything in its prodigious power to destroy.
“Patriarchy is a social system in which males hold primary power, predominate in roles of political leadership, moral authority, social privilege and control of property; in the domain of the family, fathers or father-figures hold authority over women and children.” (A googled definition)
Most people don’t realize that the Genesis story was purposely written to destroy the religion of the Goddess and establish patriarchy as divine right. In the fake fall from grace, that never ever happened, Eve, who was created from Adam’s rib after Lilith proved to be such a disappointment, fell under the influence of the snake and either ate an apple from the tree of good and evil, and then offered one to Adam, or she encouraged Adam to share an apple with her. God, the father, had forbidden Adam and Eve to eat the fruit from the tree of good and evil, also called the tree of knowledge, and God being God knew what they’d been up to when he found them hiding their nakedness in the bushes. No question God saw this as Eve’s fault. He promptly threw them out of the garden, cursed Eve with painful childbirth, and strict obedience to her husband, and gave Adam dominion over the earth.
I was in an all girl’s religious school from the 5th grade through my second year in college, studied bible every year, and it made no sense to me whatsoever that Eve and her curiosity should be blamed for humanity’s downfall. And clearly she was. Painful childbirth and obedience to one’s husband, versus dominion over the earth? Uh hello. We might live in a very different world had Adam said, “Yo Yahweh, Eve didn’t make me eat that apple, it was my decision.” But nooooo. This is probably why men who rape have gotten away with it for so long; it wasn’t his fault, it was what she was wearing, it was how she was acting. Does anyone remember “The Accused,” starring Jody Foster? The entire premise of the movie revolved around whether she deserved to get raped, or not, and whether or not she was asking for it. Nothing is more emblematic of patriarchy than the idea that women dress and/or ask and/or deserve to be raped. That, and the economic axiom, that the finite value of something determines its worth. In other words, that which is infinite has no value. Air has always been seen as infinite, as in we have an infinite amount of air. It has no value so pollute at will because there’s plenty more. Oh dear, I have digressed once again.
The ethics and morality of any given culture are based on its religion and all three major religions share the Genesis story. Violence against women is a global epidemic and would not be happening at the mind boggling rate it happens (1 in 3 women will suffer violence at the hands of men) if a tacit agreement did not exist in the culture that allowed for it. This tacit agreement is directly rooted in religion, i.e., woman is responsible for the downfall of man. To continue to ignore the connection between religion and misogyny is flat out stupid. Nothing has more destructively impacted and disempowered women — their sex, their sensuality, their instincts, their intuition, their judgment, who they are, what they are, and what they can be — than organized, patriarchal religion. (P.S. Patriarchy is every bit as destructive to its sons as it is to its daughters, but that's another post)
When I got into recovery and the great work of knowing self, I spent years reading about ancient Goddess cultures and traditions. What left me quaking was that every symbol sacred to the goddess was made evil in the Genesis story. For instance, in school I’d been taught the snake was Satan. When I asked my bible teacher, “If God created everything, why would he create Satan?” she smiled and told me the ways of God were mysterious. Furthermore, she went on to say, the story was about free will. God gave us free will and Adam and Eve misused their will, when they disobeyed God’s edict and ate the fruit from the tree of knowledge. God was justifiably angry and threw them out of paradise. Today, I think that’s the reason why organized religion, as it is currently, overwhelmingly practiced, is about getting back into God’s graces and staying there. It's terror based. Clearly, this God has serious control issues and no problem raining vengeance down on anyone who crosses him.
There are so many more ways the Genesis story stripped the Goddess of her power, but I don’t really have the time to get into all of them here. If you’re interested read, When God Was a Woman by Merlin Stone and The Chalice and the Blade by Riane Eisler I will say this though; the final nail in the destruction of the Goddess was giving man dominion over the earth. Goddess had always been earth and now man, by God’s decree, had dominion over her. Man finally had dominion over woman. Keep in mind patriarchy is only a little over 6,000 years old. Goddess culture existed for some 25,000 years before that.
All women are born woman wild and then patriarchal culture does its soul stomping thing, in an attempt to eviscerate it. We are socialized by patriarchal, social systems so we are quite literally programmed to view ourselves through the lens of patriarchy. What this means is that women are taught to judge themselves against patriarchal standards. As the basic tenet of any patriarchy is the submission of women, we are always going to come up lacking, and until we begin to recognize what we are unconsciously judging themselves against, we will continue to chase our tails over the same themes. The whole argument that has been going on since I was a young mother, as to whether being a stay-at- home-mom made you less of a feminist, than working outside the home, is absolutely rooted in patriarchal thought. The idea that a career outside the home is more important than full time homemaker is a belief intrinsic to patriarchy. The whole virgin-whore split is directly rooted in patriarchy, as is the idea that you should put everyone’s needs before yours, because that’s what a good woman does. That’s not what a good woman does, that’s what a masochist does. But that is what women have been programmed to do until the day arrives when they are done, stick-a-fork-in-their-body-done, and they say, “This is fucking bullshit.” That’s when the woman wild kicks in.
The woman wild honors her feelings, where she’s at, and where she’s been. Just because a feeling is uncomfortable doesn’t make it wrong; the feeling is a barometer of what’s going on with her and she will sit with it until she knows right use of the feeling. Woman wild is authentic, ever growing in her authenticity. She loves self beyond all reason, trusts her judgment, her instincts, her intuition, and can be a bitch to beat the band. She’s moody, she’s upbeat, and she’s so tender she can make you cry. She’s whimsical, magical, mystical, and funny. She blesses her own unique expression of femininity and her own unique expression of sexuality. She is human, humane, and not perfect. She can be flawed without beating herself to a pulp. She is embodied spirituality, meaning her spirituality does not split her off from the human, from the so call mundane, and she recognizes the living, breathing connection and strengthening dance between them. The woman wild is not on the planet to be “good.” She’s not here to be bad either; she’s here to evolve into her truest self and along the way bring all the colors of that process to life and living. The woman wild dances the dark and the light; she is Goddess and like the Goddess she contains everything, not just the easily digestible. Again, every woman is born woman wild. One of my favorite woman wild exercises is in Women Who Run With Wolves by Clarissa Pinkola Estes . It's called the Scar Coat. You literally take a coat and draw, or sew, or bead, or a combination of all the three, the scars of your life on the coat. When you're done, you put it on, and stand in front of a mirror. My experience of this exercise and the experience of my friends who've done it? We were never more beautiful; we were never more proud of where we'd been. We reclaimed pieces of ourselves that we had no idea we'd lost.
Key to woman wild is ever questioning the "why" of the world in which we live. When I first started to question after my son was born, I was terrified; clearly I was going to hell. Looking back I was already in hell; safe, but hell all the same. The questioning is what freed me. Since I drew the woman wild card for the week I would say there’s some big questions going on in the Tribe of Women. Some of you are rattling the cages that bind you, which is the beginning of getting out. Some of you who are already outside one cage are finding you’re stuck in yet another. Some of you are bumping into certain behaviors that are just not working for you on any level and you’re wondering, how do I change this. Still others are trying to figure out how to stop beating themselves to a pulp and still others are asking what the fuck happened to the world and how can I be part of changing it. These are big questions and only the strong and the courageous ask them. I’m smiling now because I remember a teacher telling me once how brave I was, and I said, “Uh uh I’m scared to death. I’m so afraid of making the wrong decision or doing the wrong thing.” She smiled and said, “Mistakes can always be made right, you can always learn from your mistakes. I am not talking about murder, robbing banks and crime, you understand?” I nodded, she went on. “Sometimes mistakes are the best possible things that could happen to you. As for courage, most of the time all courage is, is fear with prayers. Sometimes the greatest act of courage you’ll ever take is walking through your fears.” Though in my early 30's I didn't really believe her, I thought she was just trying to make me feel better, now all these years later, I agree with her 100%.
Woman Wild is a big card symbolizing big upheavals that our souls are calling to us. I find howling at the moon or just howling is extraordinarily beneficial. There's something about the sound of the howl coming out of you that is beyond empowering. Its like yelling, "I am here-here-here. All of me-me-me. " Growling works well too. I also love the Kali chant when there's soul upheaval all around. She always shows me what's really going on, even when I don't want to know, or I think I know. I am inevitably calmed afterward because being in the truth of one's knowing or feeling, is incredibly soothing. Kali gets a bad rap, some say she is bloodthirsty, others say she's a demon due to her complete misrepresentation in one of the Raiders of the Lost Arc movies. My experience of Kali has been nothing but life affirming in every way. She was actually the first Goddess who ever came to me long before I’d started my studies. The second was Isis.
I am writing the chant as it sounds, not necessarily how it is spelled.
OM KA LEE KA YAY
NAH MA
Anyone who has ever worked with me knows I’m a mala bead person. If you don’t have any, get some. There are 108 malas to one strand of mala beads. What you do is hold the bead, say the entire chant, hold the next bead, say the entire chant, and work your way around the mala. Some people like chanting one full time around the mala. I usually go for 4-5 times. A really great affirmation for when you have a lot of disparate pieces floating around and you're feeling a bit unhinged: "The right and perfect pieces flow together in right and perfect time for the best resolution possible."
May the woman wild be strong within you. I’m a wishing each of you your best dreams or something better.
Live loud, love fierce, and suffer no fools, Kat xo
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Please be advised, I periodically run specials, offering pretty, darn terrific savings. If the special is not advertised after the weekly card, then it is no longer running. If a special is advertised after the weekly card, it runs for one week, unless otherwise noted. You can buy during the week of the special and use it within the month if you'd like. But it will no longer be valid after 4 weeks. I hope this clears up and any all confusion. Also, you are required to pay upfront before the reading. I would love to let everyone pay after the service provided, but unfortunately too many people have taken advantage for me to continue the policy.
For Wise Woman Counseling and Life Coaching
Click the above link and scroll down the page.
Jersey peeps, I will be moving at the end of November so if you want to get in for a face to face soul reading, you’d best book now.
For my clients all over the United States and the world, the skype address will remain the same!
For my newbies here is a link to my services.
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Cards of the Week: 10/31/2016 - Imagine and Empower
Hello my darlings, the weekly card is a little different this week because I drew 2 cards at the same time; one was stuck to the other. My guidance was to do them both so here we go. The cards I pulled were Imagine and Empower. In the most literal sense what we imagine we empower. To empower something is to give a person, place, or thing, power. New Age thinking tells us like (what is powerful) attracts like (what is equally powerful) which according to the law of mentalism (you create your own reality), is as much fact as gravity.
When I first started working with the Law of Mentalism some forty years ago, I was utterly fascinated by the idea that we create our reality. I was taught that I was creating whatever I didn’t like in my life, (as well as what I liked) and therefore I was responsible for keeping and holding onto that which was making me miserable. No matter what happened, good, bad, or indifferent, I was creating it and it was up to me to un-create it. I controlled my life.
At 63, after almost 40 years of dancing the sacred, there is no question in me that we can energetically impact our lives and can work the currents of any situation to our benefit. I also know that I can’t control my life. In more instances than not, I can dictate the terms, put out there what I want, but I can’t control my life because it leaves out the reality of other people’s bad behavior, the play of light and shadow, karma, grace, and miracles.
I had coffee yesterday with an old friend from my early days in New York City. To this day, she and I refer to our 20's as our young and immortal years, and it was just by chance that we ran into each other, on a crosstown bus of all things. She's living in upstate New York now and going through a vicious divorce; Dante’s hell has nothing on this woman’s divorce. When I was going through my own divorce saga some 30 years ago, I ran into my then spiritual teacher in front of a bakeshop on Broadway. I told him that my ex had changed the terms of the separation agreement; terms we had worked out together over a foot massage. The terms were now unworkable and I was going to have to get a lawyer. He looked me right in the eye and said, “You’re creating this shit storm." “Defending my legal rights and the legal rights of my son, is creating a shit storm?” He glared at me and walked away. I was young, still pretty new to the great work, but I knew in my gut getting a lawyer was the right thing, no matter how un-spiritual it made me. And as I walked down West 91st Street towards West End Avenue, not for the first time I was sharply aware of the split within. It felt like I was living two lives, the spiritual, and the real, and they were as far apart as they could be.
Back to coffee with my friend. I love this woman; she’s funny, she’s loud, she’s got a heart of gold, and she works at a non-profit saving the planet. She is not being unreasonable on any level, anymore than I was back in the day. Since the divorce began, the man has pissed in her car, put her contact information on a porn site, had her cursed, and that’s the mild stuff. I can hear my former teacher in my head, “What is she doing to create this?” If I was still dealing with the man, I would say, “She is not responsible for her ex’s behavior, anymore than the women in the Congo, are responsible for being herded into rape camps and gang raped 48 hours a day.”
Clearly the idea of creating your reality, as a means of controlling your life, is wrong use of a very real concept. We all feel powerless sometimes; we are all victims sometimes and in the throes of feeling, the worst thing you can possibly do is to ask yourself, why am I creating this. You’ll drive yourself crazy trying to figure it out, and/or you’ll figure it out incorrectly because you’re not thinking clearly. Either way you’ll end up beating yourself to a pulp, which does no one any good, and it’s not going to change the feelings and/or deeply uncomfortable experience you’re having. What is called for here is compassion; accepting where you are and loving that wounded piece of self, which is way more difficult than jumping to what am I doing to create this, because we’ve been so programmed to think, to believe, our feelings are wrong, especially if the feelings are one of the so-called ugly, feelings, like rage and revenge and feeling less then and ashamed.
If you really want to create your reality than you have to accept who you are and where you are warts and all. Acceptance of this kind is a profound act of self-love. The deeper the acceptance, the deeper the love, and the greater the ability to create. Contrary to popular opinion, having your so-called ugly feelings won’t create your reality; not having your feelings — repressing them, splitting off from them —will, because they’re cast into your shadow, where they will continue to fester and grow and eventually begin to control your behavior. Putting positive thoughts on top of extreme feelings such as I-am-going-to-be-destitute-and-homeless is an exercise in futility because the feelings are just too damn strong. (Yes, I’m using an example from my own life) But, if I bring that terrorized, panicked piece in, love her, and hold her because she’s part of me, (and I want all my pieces, not just the easily digestible), eventually she will calm and tell me that she feels completely powerless to change anything. In my head I know I can change my life for the better, I have tangible experience of changing my life for the better, but in the moment, the feeling is so overwhelming and so painful and I’m so exhausted, I can’t stop crying.
I know exactly what it’s like to be lost in pools of agony and have someone look at me and say what are you doing to create this. It’s punitive, ineffective, and a result of the teacher/person being so terrified of her/his own feelings she/he has to shut everyone else’s down. Thank Goddess, I weeded those people out of my life long ago, which made room for the best friends in the entire world. Friends with whom I can share my true feelings; friends who are not going to judge me, or try to fix me. Clearly, I knew I needed another source of income, and a cheaper apartment, and yes, time was of the essence, but what was more important in the moment was nurturing this aching, sobbing piece of me, who believed no matter what she did nothing was ever going to change and she was going to end up in a homeless shelter.
It took a few days of talking with my nearest and dearest, and chanting the pagan hail-lady-full-of-grace over and over, for the wounded piece in me to calm. The feelings of powerlessness and unworthiness were still there. My first spiritual teacher would have told me to let it go. Hmmmm. How many times have you tried to let go of something but no matter what you did, it just wasn’t happening? If you can’t let something go, it’s not because there’s something wrong with you, or you’re resisting, or you’re into pain; it’s because it needs to be transformed. This is how you do that. Hold the so-called bad feelings on one side of your heart and place your hand over them. Hold the exact opposite of the bad feelings on the other side of your heart and place your other hand on top of them. Then what you do is sit quietly and let the opposites press and grind against the other. Ultimately something new is born. It feels like balm, it feels like thick and creamy light, it feels calm, and you feel whole, meaning — not split between the spiritual and the mundane. In this space of completeness you’re ready to create.
Creating anything takes imagination and guts because what you’re basically saying is I want this and/or I’m doing this and nothing is going to stop me. If I ran the world I would require people to spend an hour a day imagining what makes them feel joyful. I would require people to spend time imagining what it feels like to be loved; really truly loved. I would require people to spend time thinking about what they really wanted, and if they didn't know, to say, I don’t know, and add a yet to it. Love, joy, and knowing what you want are three of the five most powerful magnets of creation; the fourth and fifth are receptivity and trust. If you can’t trust, if you’re not open to receiving, then whatever it is you’re trying to create, to bring into your life is going to bounce off the wall of you.
Need triggers desire. Desire triggers imagination and imagination triggers empowerment, meaning it gives power to the thing desired. Imagination strengthens, sharpens, and hones desire. The more powerful the desire, the more powerfully magnetic the attraction. Witches say, “Desire cracks open the gates, if you’re ready it will take you through.” Imagination, desire, and empowerment are a triangle of connected interdependence. They feed each other; the strength of one is dependent on the strength of another. The triangle is contained within the circle and the circle is life.
Each of us is a microcosm, a circle of life, and each of us contains the triangle of manifestation. Each of us is born with the ability and the power to create our worlds, but the set up of the “system” is hell bent on making sure we forget, that which was freely given. Creating is a conscious engagement of the pragmatic and the magical. Taking physical actions for what you want, walking through your fears and asking for help, empowers you and your desire, and is every bit as important as imagining what you want and how it would feel to have it. There’s a spiritual axiom — what you can imagine, you can create. In my experience it may not always come in the form you expect, but you will get the essence, the intrinsic nature, the unique quality, of your desire.
As for me and the creation process I’m in right now, without friends none of what I’m about to do would be possible. I am so grateful I tear up at the oddest times, like when I’m on line at the CVS or mailing a letter at the post office. The other day as I walking, absorbing delicious fall, I said out loud, “I wish everyone had the kind of friends I have.” I stopped, dropped root, and sent that wish into the heavens. The synchronicity of the moment wasn’t lost on me. Halloween, what my people call Samhain (sowen) is the witches new year. What better time to send that wish into the ethers.
Live loud, love fierce, and suffer no fools. Kat
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Please be advised, I periodically run specials, offering pretty, darn terrific savings. If the special is not advertised after the weekly card, then it is no longer running. If a special is advertised after the weekly card, it runs for one week, unless otherwise noted. You can buy during the week of the special and use it within the month if you'd like. But it will no longer be valid after 4 weeks. I hope this clears up and any all confusion. Also you are required to pay upfront before the reading. I would love to let you pay after the service provided, but unfortunately too many people have taken advantage for me to continue the policy.
For Wise Woman Counseling and Life Coaching
Click the above link and scroll down the page.
Jersey peeps, I will be moving at the end of November so if you want to get in for a soul reading, you’d best book now. If you live in the Hudson Valley, that's where I'll be!
For my clients all over the United States and the world, the skype address will remain the same!
For my newbies here is a link to my services.
As ever I look forward to serving all of you and thank you for opportunity to do the work that’s written on my soul. Blessings. K
When I first started working with the Law of Mentalism some forty years ago, I was utterly fascinated by the idea that we create our reality. I was taught that I was creating whatever I didn’t like in my life, (as well as what I liked) and therefore I was responsible for keeping and holding onto that which was making me miserable. No matter what happened, good, bad, or indifferent, I was creating it and it was up to me to un-create it. I controlled my life.
At 63, after almost 40 years of dancing the sacred, there is no question in me that we can energetically impact our lives and can work the currents of any situation to our benefit. I also know that I can’t control my life. In more instances than not, I can dictate the terms, put out there what I want, but I can’t control my life because it leaves out the reality of other people’s bad behavior, the play of light and shadow, karma, grace, and miracles.
I had coffee yesterday with an old friend from my early days in New York City. To this day, she and I refer to our 20's as our young and immortal years, and it was just by chance that we ran into each other, on a crosstown bus of all things. She's living in upstate New York now and going through a vicious divorce; Dante’s hell has nothing on this woman’s divorce. When I was going through my own divorce saga some 30 years ago, I ran into my then spiritual teacher in front of a bakeshop on Broadway. I told him that my ex had changed the terms of the separation agreement; terms we had worked out together over a foot massage. The terms were now unworkable and I was going to have to get a lawyer. He looked me right in the eye and said, “You’re creating this shit storm." “Defending my legal rights and the legal rights of my son, is creating a shit storm?” He glared at me and walked away. I was young, still pretty new to the great work, but I knew in my gut getting a lawyer was the right thing, no matter how un-spiritual it made me. And as I walked down West 91st Street towards West End Avenue, not for the first time I was sharply aware of the split within. It felt like I was living two lives, the spiritual, and the real, and they were as far apart as they could be.
Back to coffee with my friend. I love this woman; she’s funny, she’s loud, she’s got a heart of gold, and she works at a non-profit saving the planet. She is not being unreasonable on any level, anymore than I was back in the day. Since the divorce began, the man has pissed in her car, put her contact information on a porn site, had her cursed, and that’s the mild stuff. I can hear my former teacher in my head, “What is she doing to create this?” If I was still dealing with the man, I would say, “She is not responsible for her ex’s behavior, anymore than the women in the Congo, are responsible for being herded into rape camps and gang raped 48 hours a day.”
Clearly the idea of creating your reality, as a means of controlling your life, is wrong use of a very real concept. We all feel powerless sometimes; we are all victims sometimes and in the throes of feeling, the worst thing you can possibly do is to ask yourself, why am I creating this. You’ll drive yourself crazy trying to figure it out, and/or you’ll figure it out incorrectly because you’re not thinking clearly. Either way you’ll end up beating yourself to a pulp, which does no one any good, and it’s not going to change the feelings and/or deeply uncomfortable experience you’re having. What is called for here is compassion; accepting where you are and loving that wounded piece of self, which is way more difficult than jumping to what am I doing to create this, because we’ve been so programmed to think, to believe, our feelings are wrong, especially if the feelings are one of the so-called ugly, feelings, like rage and revenge and feeling less then and ashamed.
If you really want to create your reality than you have to accept who you are and where you are warts and all. Acceptance of this kind is a profound act of self-love. The deeper the acceptance, the deeper the love, and the greater the ability to create. Contrary to popular opinion, having your so-called ugly feelings won’t create your reality; not having your feelings — repressing them, splitting off from them —will, because they’re cast into your shadow, where they will continue to fester and grow and eventually begin to control your behavior. Putting positive thoughts on top of extreme feelings such as I-am-going-to-be-destitute-and-homeless is an exercise in futility because the feelings are just too damn strong. (Yes, I’m using an example from my own life) But, if I bring that terrorized, panicked piece in, love her, and hold her because she’s part of me, (and I want all my pieces, not just the easily digestible), eventually she will calm and tell me that she feels completely powerless to change anything. In my head I know I can change my life for the better, I have tangible experience of changing my life for the better, but in the moment, the feeling is so overwhelming and so painful and I’m so exhausted, I can’t stop crying.
I know exactly what it’s like to be lost in pools of agony and have someone look at me and say what are you doing to create this. It’s punitive, ineffective, and a result of the teacher/person being so terrified of her/his own feelings she/he has to shut everyone else’s down. Thank Goddess, I weeded those people out of my life long ago, which made room for the best friends in the entire world. Friends with whom I can share my true feelings; friends who are not going to judge me, or try to fix me. Clearly, I knew I needed another source of income, and a cheaper apartment, and yes, time was of the essence, but what was more important in the moment was nurturing this aching, sobbing piece of me, who believed no matter what she did nothing was ever going to change and she was going to end up in a homeless shelter.
It took a few days of talking with my nearest and dearest, and chanting the pagan hail-lady-full-of-grace over and over, for the wounded piece in me to calm. The feelings of powerlessness and unworthiness were still there. My first spiritual teacher would have told me to let it go. Hmmmm. How many times have you tried to let go of something but no matter what you did, it just wasn’t happening? If you can’t let something go, it’s not because there’s something wrong with you, or you’re resisting, or you’re into pain; it’s because it needs to be transformed. This is how you do that. Hold the so-called bad feelings on one side of your heart and place your hand over them. Hold the exact opposite of the bad feelings on the other side of your heart and place your other hand on top of them. Then what you do is sit quietly and let the opposites press and grind against the other. Ultimately something new is born. It feels like balm, it feels like thick and creamy light, it feels calm, and you feel whole, meaning — not split between the spiritual and the mundane. In this space of completeness you’re ready to create.
Creating anything takes imagination and guts because what you’re basically saying is I want this and/or I’m doing this and nothing is going to stop me. If I ran the world I would require people to spend an hour a day imagining what makes them feel joyful. I would require people to spend time imagining what it feels like to be loved; really truly loved. I would require people to spend time thinking about what they really wanted, and if they didn't know, to say, I don’t know, and add a yet to it. Love, joy, and knowing what you want are three of the five most powerful magnets of creation; the fourth and fifth are receptivity and trust. If you can’t trust, if you’re not open to receiving, then whatever it is you’re trying to create, to bring into your life is going to bounce off the wall of you.
Need triggers desire. Desire triggers imagination and imagination triggers empowerment, meaning it gives power to the thing desired. Imagination strengthens, sharpens, and hones desire. The more powerful the desire, the more powerfully magnetic the attraction. Witches say, “Desire cracks open the gates, if you’re ready it will take you through.” Imagination, desire, and empowerment are a triangle of connected interdependence. They feed each other; the strength of one is dependent on the strength of another. The triangle is contained within the circle and the circle is life.
Each of us is a microcosm, a circle of life, and each of us contains the triangle of manifestation. Each of us is born with the ability and the power to create our worlds, but the set up of the “system” is hell bent on making sure we forget, that which was freely given. Creating is a conscious engagement of the pragmatic and the magical. Taking physical actions for what you want, walking through your fears and asking for help, empowers you and your desire, and is every bit as important as imagining what you want and how it would feel to have it. There’s a spiritual axiom — what you can imagine, you can create. In my experience it may not always come in the form you expect, but you will get the essence, the intrinsic nature, the unique quality, of your desire.
As for me and the creation process I’m in right now, without friends none of what I’m about to do would be possible. I am so grateful I tear up at the oddest times, like when I’m on line at the CVS or mailing a letter at the post office. The other day as I walking, absorbing delicious fall, I said out loud, “I wish everyone had the kind of friends I have.” I stopped, dropped root, and sent that wish into the heavens. The synchronicity of the moment wasn’t lost on me. Halloween, what my people call Samhain (sowen) is the witches new year. What better time to send that wish into the ethers.
Live loud, love fierce, and suffer no fools. Kat
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Jersey peeps, I will be moving at the end of November so if you want to get in for a soul reading, you’d best book now. If you live in the Hudson Valley, that's where I'll be!
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As ever I look forward to serving all of you and thank you for opportunity to do the work that’s written on my soul. Blessings. K
Card of the Week : 10/17/2016
Reclaim: Root, Ground, Write
Biddy Early was born dirt poor in Ireland in 1798. At 16, as was the custom in poor families, Biddy was sent to nearby Feakle to work as a serving girl. She was later sent to Kilbarron to work for a doctor. In Kilbarron, she met and married Pat O’Malley and they had a daughter. A few years into the marriage, he died. She then married Tom Flannery and had a son. Tom died when the boy was 8. Biddy could not pay her rent and was served with an eviction notice.
According to the story, the night before the police were coming to kick her out, her dead husband Tom visited her and told her to tell the police, as they approached her home, to: “Stay where you are.” She did just that and the five policemen and the sheriff’s feet were stuck to the road for two hours. No matter how they pulled, they couldn’t break free. After 2 hours, Biddy told them to go away and never return. The spell was broken and the men took off like scared bunnies. The police never bothered Biddy again.
Biddy was known throughout Ireland as a seer, herbalist, and healer. She had a small, magical blue bottle, a present from her dead son, who returned from the dead to give it to her, into which she gazed before healing or prophesying. Biddy was never without her blue bottle. Her healing potions and her knowledge of herbs, was legendary; her predictions stunningly accurate, and she could remove the wraith of the fairies. Rather than charging money for her services, Biddy accepted food and whiskey. Consequently her house was stocked with liquor and became known as a great place to drink and play cards. Though Biddy was beloved by the community the priests didn’t like her. Of course they didn't. The priests controlled every aspect of people’s lives and Biddy threatened everything it meant to be a good catholic. She concocted herbal potions which effectively healed animals and humans. She prophesied with stunning accuracy. She was poor, not in the least bit humble, remarried every time yet another husband died, and didn't a rat's ass what the rich or the priests thought. Every story about Biddy Early that has survived is adamant about the fact that she never once spoke against the Catholic Church or the priests; even the parish priest, who denounced her from the altar, and instructed the people to stop seeing her. They did not.
In 1865, Biddy Early was accused of witchcraft. The community support for Biddy was so great that the few who agreed to testify against her backed out, and she was acquitted due to a lack of evidence. Ultimately, Biddy would die of natural causes, a priest at her bedside, because she’d asked for last rites. One story says that she and the priest were close friends and she asked him to throw the bottle into the lake. He did, crying all the way. Can I tell you how many times i've dreamed of finding that lake and diving for her bottle??? Imagine my surprise when an elder back in the day told me I had my own bottle. I'm getting to that so bear with me.
Reclaiming is part of the process of taking your power back. When we reclaim, we take in the pieces of ourselves that we have kept at arms distance. We recover the pieces of ourselves that have been split off by the hard demands of life and living. Why do we split off from self? Survival, usually, and pain. When we don’t fit the paradigm we’ve been taught and programmed to fit into we split off from that piece of us that makes us different. We split off from that which makes us unique. One of the ways I end workshops is I ask everyone to take hands, close their eyes, and feel what we all have in common. That’s an easy exercise for most. Than I say, “Now feel that which makes you unique.” It’s amazing how hard it is for people to feel connected to others when they feel their uniqueness. Clearly we’ve been taught to believe that uniqueness is a source of separation and division, when nothing could be further from the truth.
To own, to recognize, to retrieve, that which makes you unique allows you to connect even more intimately with others, because you’re coming from a place that is more honestly you. By the same token, you will have less in common with certain people in your life. This doesn’t mean you’re not connected; we’re all interconnected, it simply means your energy is directed elsewhere, creating a more powerful and empowering web in which to live.
Close your eyes and imagine a ray of energy connecting all of us. Now, keeping that ray, feel that which makes you unique and see that as another ray, reaching out of your body. Like attracts like, so that ray is growing, being drawn, towards what supports it. When the ray connects with what feeds it, more rays will grow from that connection and a new web of multicolored ray energy begins to take form. Webs come and go, webs give way to other webs; what we all have in common, however, is forever.
I think most people deny their uniqueness out of self-protection. If they are who they truly are they will be attacked and maligned. This is not a figment of their imagination; this is truly their experience, so to own, recognize, and even enjoy one’s delicious uniqueness is absolutely terrifying. To deny self, though, is to exasperate the feeling of being unloved, and to know pain, conscious and unconscious, beyond all reason. Pain beyond all reason must be numbed. This leads to addiction — drugs, people, behaviors, food, booze, work, co-dependency, whatever — and addiction is the most telling and virulent symptom we have of the denial of self. Addiction is what powerless looks like, and where there is powerlessness there is rage, there is blame, there is either-or thinking — my way or the highway — you are either for us or against us — and the ray which connects us all, that which each and every one of us has in common, is rendered null and void. The connecting ray isn't destroyed, it's simply ignored. Clearly, what we have in common is as important as that which makes us unique.
In order to reclaim, we must dive into the lake (the unconscious) and retrieve the magick blue bottle that contains our power. We all have one, and at some point in order to survive, in order to protect ourselves, we threw it into the water. But now, what’s happening is our methods of survival have turned on us and are doing way more harm than good. Our methods of survival are thwarting the ray of uniqueness from finding like, connecting, and creating a new a new and beauteous web. If you feel like you're sitting on Pandora's box, doing everything you possibly can to keep it shut, there's a good bet reclaiming has found you. Get off the box, let the demons fly free, invite them to tea, and see what they want.
The most beneficial way I know to work with the rough waters of reclaiming is to root, ground, and go for walks. Keeping a journal of the mercurial thoughts racing through your brain is another great idea. I would also suggest the following affirmations:
I am a unique instrument of life’s divine power.
I honor my talents and abilities.
Power is right use of love made visible.
I am the brave woman/man, the wise woman/man, ever coming in touch with the wisdom and the guidance of my deepest and highest self.
My path rises up to meet me.
I have a great sense of humor.
Though reclaiming is not for the faint of heart, at 63 I've never met a man or woman who engaged the process and didn't ultimately come to the peace that passes all understanding. I am wishing you good journey.
Live loud, love fierce, and suffer no fools. Kat
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Card of the Week: 10/10/2016
Initiation; Abrupt Change
I had the following dream some 30 years ago when I started to do the great work of knowing self. I was sitting —criss-cross applesauce— on sand, in the middle of a pyramid. I was there for a reason; I’d chosen to be there. My eyes were closed and I’d dropped a root deep into the earth from the base of my spine. When the lightning hit (clearly that’s what I was waiting for) the tippy-top point of the pyramid, the energy traveled down the interconnected, interior webbing within the walls, and the air around me became so electric that if I was not as rooted as I was, I would have fried. Hugely terrifying fireworks of electricity were bursting around me but I stayed focused on my root and the earth energy flowing into my body. I don’t know how long it went on; I do remember when it was over. I opened my eyes and patted myself down. The inside of the pyramid looked exactly the same, but it was completely differently. That’s when I noticed a copper framed mirror on the sand next to me. I looked exactly the same but I was completely different. That is initiation.
As a witch I live the interconnectedness of all things. There is no split between spirit and flesh in the craft. What this means is initiation not only happens in the realms of what people call spiritual, but in the so called mundane as well. Getting sober, getting divorced, helping a terminally ill friend, selling a house you’ve lived in for over 50 years and buying a farm in the middle of bucolic nowhere, all of these are initiations. They turn you upside down; they upset and change you; they bring you closer to who you truly are. The so-called spiritual initiation deepens your intuitive understanding of the great mystery — that we are all connected. The mystical experience is the experience of that connection. Like the so call mundane initiation, it changes you; it opens your eyes to vastness of your being and life. In my experience, everything goes straight to hell after a spiritual initiation. It feels so good when it happens but inevitably, a day or a few days later, the extreme of whatever’s blocking my new, uncovered truth, shoots to the surface unseating the bliss I'd just had a few days ago.
I can’t even begin to tell you how many times, I’ve wondered what ancient school of wisdom came up with initiation and why. I mean seriously, it’s so damn hard, and please don’t write me and say, “Well if you just quit resisting.” I don’t resist initiation; I know when it’s on me. Furthermore, some things in life are in fact hard. Not because you make them hard, but just because they are. Initiation carries the force of a lightning strike and that force rips away every thing a person knows and counts on to survive. It’s pretty damn terrifying when what you thought was solid vaporizes before your eyes. When that happens it’s close to impossible to believe, to imagine, that the Universe is conspiring for your deepest and highest good.
For me initiation is about a working faith. Can I hold true that this process I am in will take me to a better place? Can I hold true that if I show up and take right action on any given day that I will be all right? Sometimes I can and sometimes I can’t. Sometimes I get so mad at God I could spit. What I do have is a rock solid willingness; as real and as tangible as gravity. So when I can’t possibly see myself coming out the other end of the tunnel, when I can’t possibly see how I’m going to get through what I’m going through, I take a moment and say, I am willing to be willing to know that this process is leading me to a much happier and joyous place. I may not believe it in the moment but I'm willing too. I am alway willing to allow for the possibility of miracles.
I do not believe we are here to be miserable; I don’t think we’re here to be joyous all the time either. I think we’re here to uncover the symphonies that we are. If you’ve been to a symphony you know that what makes it great is the build. One note, one chord, builds on the next, and on the next; chords come together, break apart, come back together. The horns start, then the bass drum, loud crescendo, and climax! The music begins to slow, to wane, find a new beginning within its eternity. The build begins all over again; new chords, chord combinations, and the best chords of the old. I love to imagine all of our individual symphonies coming together and forming the most magnificent orchestra, under the rainbow umbrella that is the tribe of humanity. I’m thinking John Lennon,….“You may say I’m a dreamer, but I’m not the only one…” It feels so good to imagine, doesn’t it?
So how can something that feels so good exist next to something that feels so horrible? That question is the key to initiation. Everything contains it opposite, not in terms of opposing but in terms of compliment. Rather than splitting off, rising above, and denying the difficulty with an affirmation — I am joyous, this is easy — try holding the tension of the opposites. Hold the opposing feelings in your heart; put one hand on one feeling and the other hand on the other and feel them press and grind against each other. Within a matter of minutes you will feel both sides give and something new come into being. Have you ever seen a volcano make land? Lava spews forth and becomes land as it cools. The new that comes into being from holding the opposites is virgin land; as of yet unexplored. A new and beckoning path, perhaps?
This is the alchemy; the alchemy of psyche. Initiation ultimately leads to alchemy; the hard, the ugly, the agonizing, is transformed into pure gold. Returning to my pyramid dream, after the initiation there was a copper framed mirror lying next to me. Copper is the metal of Venus/Aphrodite; Venus/Aphrodite is an alchemical Goddess. Venus/Aphrodite is the Goddess of love and love is alchemical. Witches chant, "She changes everything She touches and everything She touches changes." Any act of alchemy then is an act of self-love.
I still wish the ancients could have come up with a softer, easier way.
Live loud, love fierce, and suffer no fools. Kat x0x0x
P.S. The booklist is up!
P.S.S. The new services page is up!!
P.S.S. For a soul reading....
Card of the Week: 10/03/2016
Communicate: Forward Movement, Truth, Connection
I’d originally drawn another card for the week but I woke up this morning with this card. It took me over 40 years to trust my instincts and intuition and at 63 I’m not going to stop now.
My friends and I are passionate men and women, actively living large as life and interacting with the world around us. Of course, we’re going to have our ups and downs; we’re loving, interesting, complicated, tender, funny human beings — not machines. I can think of a few times some my friends wouldn’t listen to reason and I sure can think of a few times I wouldn’t either. So what did we do? We gave it a rest; we went to our opposite corners till things calmed down and maybe later we’d work it out; maybe not. Maybe it would just be water under the bridge, or become a giggle between us.
I’m thinking about my friend David, who gave me dried flowers for my 37th birthday. I burst into tears, “Is this what you think?! I’m dried beauty now that I’ve turned 37!” I was newly sober, PMS to the max, and didn’t speak to him for a month. Then we ran into each other on West 77th and burst out laughing. “I’m dried beauty!” became a running gag between us. I can’t fathom at 63 why I was so upset about turning 37. I’m flashing now on a a time I was truly wrong. It was summer naturally, and I was walking through hell, on the attack, and a friend of mine took the brunt of it. I literally ruined her daughter’s birthday with my nasty texts. There were seeds of a drama present already, but still I was way of out of line. Almost a year later, I was riding my bike down Park Street when I ran into her. Not literally; she was getting the mail and I was riding by on the sidewalk. I braked; she looked at me, I looked at her. “I'm really sorry," I said. "Words cannot express how sorry I am,” and I meant it with every fiber of my being. “It’s okay,” she said, “No, it's not," I said. "I hurt you and I am truly sorry and I miss you. A lot.”
A few watery hugs later, I rode on to Brookdale Park. Walking the track, I flashed on Miranda, in the Sex in the City episode when she attacked Carrie at brunch, in the coffee shop, for going out with Mr. Big. She couldn’t understand why Carrie continued to see the man when all he did was crap all over her. If she was going to keep showing up for that nightmare of a man then she deserved it. P.S Miranda’s boyfriend had just broken up with her. Miranda stormed out of the coffee shop leaving poor Carrie quivering in her chair. Fast forward to the end of the show and Miranda is on a walk when she spies her ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend near the Met. She hid behind the phone booth and watched, aching pain on her face for the man who didn’t want her. I knew that pain, who doesn't know that pain? Afterwards Miranda ran to Carrie’s, apologized, and told her she understood why she stayed with Big. Then she broke down over her ex and Carrie held her. Sometimes the point of arguments and blow-ups is to take us to a deeper intimacy with ourselves and another person. The not so pretty parts of being a human being show, like a slip, and I am ever cautioning people not the throw those parts away because they are an integral part of our humanity. Without them there would be no great books, music, movies; there would be no connection.
I think human beings in their desire for peace refuse to call something what it is for fear of appearing judgmental. But, life is a judgment call; we weigh the facts, we name, and we make a decision. Vipers in the grass are just that, vipers in the grass. Remember the scorpion who talked the frog into swimming him across the river on his back? “I can’t,” the frog said. “You’re a scorpion, you’ll sting me, and I’ll die.” “No, I won’t,” the scorpion said. So, against his better judgment, the frog swam the scorpion across the river, and the scorpion stung him right before he got off. “How could you do that?!” the frog cried, his eyes filming over with unwanted death. The scorpion said, “Because I’m a scorpion.” Clearly, peace is not the result of non-judgment. If anything refusing to judge is our undoing; we have checked out of our instincts and intuition to be fulfill some biblical or spiritual ideal of what it means to be good. You are not on the planet to be good. I am going to write that again. You are not on the planet to be good. At the same time you’re not here to be bad either, and that my darlings is the koan of life and living.
Implicit in talking things through is the idea that the person on the other end desires a mutually acceptable and beneficial resolution. Sometimes that’s the case and other times it’s just about being right. Sometimes you need someone to see and understand why you’re doing what you’re doing, but they can’t, and they won’t, because they’re either incapable of seeing past their own narcissism and envy, or they simply have no context for what you’re talking about and never will. Where we get into trouble is when we keep trying over and over to make ourselves understood to someone who will never understand. Talk about a futile battle. I remember being on the phone with a woman once, who point blank refused to get what I was saying. I was getting madder and madder and I knew it was a futile argument but I couldn’t, I wouldn’t, unhook. Even when I got off the phone I couldn’t let it go. How could she not see what I was talking about?!
The reason we can’t unhook from a futile battle is because our self-esteem and identity is tied up in the other person’s opinion. (Not that I would have believed that then) Self-esteem and identity are of the sacred feminine. When our self-esteem and identity are tied up in another’s opinion our sacred feminine is weak. The ego, or sacred masculine, serves the sacred feminine. If the sacred feminine is weak, so is the ego, and the ego ends up serving itself. Ego serving itself absolutely positively has to be right. Ergo, the futile battle — you’re-going-to-get-my-point-of-view-or-die-even-if-I-have-to-lose-years-of-my-life-fighting-with-you. We are stuck in the mud, we cannot move forward, and there is no transformation, no change, just more of the same old, same old. There is not one person reading this page who doesn’t know that stuck-in-the-mud-inability-to- move-forward feeling.
This week you’re getting ready to walk away from people, places, and things that don’t hear you. Clearly, declarations of change in any area (work, love, friendship) that have repeatedly proven to be little more than lip service, are riding your last nerve, and you’re done. This makes perfect, timely sense because summer’s astrology literally shook us out of old identities, and metamorphosis was the result. You’ve changed a lot, changes you can’t even put your finger on, and what’s beginning to work its way to the surface is that you can no longer afford to stay stuck in go nowhere conversations. It’s stopping you from following the mystical beckoning, the bliss, and living your ever-evolving truth. You don’t need anyone’s approval to step away and you certainly don’t need them to understand. You may have to be subtle, you may have to abrupt, you may have to be neutral, you might even have to cut a fiery exit, you may have to slowly ease your way out. Whatever style of action you choose remember that the action itself is an action of self love; any communication that supports the person you are, the person you are becoming, is an action of self-love. Yes, honest communication with self and the world may lose you a few people, and situations that look secure, but in the empty space is room for something new that resonates with your very being: the kind of connectedness you've wished for your entire life.
Live loud, love fierce, and suffer no fools. Kat
Communicate: Forward Movement, Truth, Connection
I’d originally drawn another card for the week but I woke up this morning with this card. It took me over 40 years to trust my instincts and intuition and at 63 I’m not going to stop now.
My friends and I are passionate men and women, actively living large as life and interacting with the world around us. Of course, we’re going to have our ups and downs; we’re loving, interesting, complicated, tender, funny human beings — not machines. I can think of a few times some my friends wouldn’t listen to reason and I sure can think of a few times I wouldn’t either. So what did we do? We gave it a rest; we went to our opposite corners till things calmed down and maybe later we’d work it out; maybe not. Maybe it would just be water under the bridge, or become a giggle between us.
I’m thinking about my friend David, who gave me dried flowers for my 37th birthday. I burst into tears, “Is this what you think?! I’m dried beauty now that I’ve turned 37!” I was newly sober, PMS to the max, and didn’t speak to him for a month. Then we ran into each other on West 77th and burst out laughing. “I’m dried beauty!” became a running gag between us. I can’t fathom at 63 why I was so upset about turning 37. I’m flashing now on a a time I was truly wrong. It was summer naturally, and I was walking through hell, on the attack, and a friend of mine took the brunt of it. I literally ruined her daughter’s birthday with my nasty texts. There were seeds of a drama present already, but still I was way of out of line. Almost a year later, I was riding my bike down Park Street when I ran into her. Not literally; she was getting the mail and I was riding by on the sidewalk. I braked; she looked at me, I looked at her. “I'm really sorry," I said. "Words cannot express how sorry I am,” and I meant it with every fiber of my being. “It’s okay,” she said, “No, it's not," I said. "I hurt you and I am truly sorry and I miss you. A lot.”
A few watery hugs later, I rode on to Brookdale Park. Walking the track, I flashed on Miranda, in the Sex in the City episode when she attacked Carrie at brunch, in the coffee shop, for going out with Mr. Big. She couldn’t understand why Carrie continued to see the man when all he did was crap all over her. If she was going to keep showing up for that nightmare of a man then she deserved it. P.S Miranda’s boyfriend had just broken up with her. Miranda stormed out of the coffee shop leaving poor Carrie quivering in her chair. Fast forward to the end of the show and Miranda is on a walk when she spies her ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend near the Met. She hid behind the phone booth and watched, aching pain on her face for the man who didn’t want her. I knew that pain, who doesn't know that pain? Afterwards Miranda ran to Carrie’s, apologized, and told her she understood why she stayed with Big. Then she broke down over her ex and Carrie held her. Sometimes the point of arguments and blow-ups is to take us to a deeper intimacy with ourselves and another person. The not so pretty parts of being a human being show, like a slip, and I am ever cautioning people not the throw those parts away because they are an integral part of our humanity. Without them there would be no great books, music, movies; there would be no connection.
I think human beings in their desire for peace refuse to call something what it is for fear of appearing judgmental. But, life is a judgment call; we weigh the facts, we name, and we make a decision. Vipers in the grass are just that, vipers in the grass. Remember the scorpion who talked the frog into swimming him across the river on his back? “I can’t,” the frog said. “You’re a scorpion, you’ll sting me, and I’ll die.” “No, I won’t,” the scorpion said. So, against his better judgment, the frog swam the scorpion across the river, and the scorpion stung him right before he got off. “How could you do that?!” the frog cried, his eyes filming over with unwanted death. The scorpion said, “Because I’m a scorpion.” Clearly, peace is not the result of non-judgment. If anything refusing to judge is our undoing; we have checked out of our instincts and intuition to be fulfill some biblical or spiritual ideal of what it means to be good. You are not on the planet to be good. I am going to write that again. You are not on the planet to be good. At the same time you’re not here to be bad either, and that my darlings is the koan of life and living.
Implicit in talking things through is the idea that the person on the other end desires a mutually acceptable and beneficial resolution. Sometimes that’s the case and other times it’s just about being right. Sometimes you need someone to see and understand why you’re doing what you’re doing, but they can’t, and they won’t, because they’re either incapable of seeing past their own narcissism and envy, or they simply have no context for what you’re talking about and never will. Where we get into trouble is when we keep trying over and over to make ourselves understood to someone who will never understand. Talk about a futile battle. I remember being on the phone with a woman once, who point blank refused to get what I was saying. I was getting madder and madder and I knew it was a futile argument but I couldn’t, I wouldn’t, unhook. Even when I got off the phone I couldn’t let it go. How could she not see what I was talking about?!
The reason we can’t unhook from a futile battle is because our self-esteem and identity is tied up in the other person’s opinion. (Not that I would have believed that then) Self-esteem and identity are of the sacred feminine. When our self-esteem and identity are tied up in another’s opinion our sacred feminine is weak. The ego, or sacred masculine, serves the sacred feminine. If the sacred feminine is weak, so is the ego, and the ego ends up serving itself. Ego serving itself absolutely positively has to be right. Ergo, the futile battle — you’re-going-to-get-my-point-of-view-or-die-even-if-I-have-to-lose-years-of-my-life-fighting-with-you. We are stuck in the mud, we cannot move forward, and there is no transformation, no change, just more of the same old, same old. There is not one person reading this page who doesn’t know that stuck-in-the-mud-inability-to- move-forward feeling.
This week you’re getting ready to walk away from people, places, and things that don’t hear you. Clearly, declarations of change in any area (work, love, friendship) that have repeatedly proven to be little more than lip service, are riding your last nerve, and you’re done. This makes perfect, timely sense because summer’s astrology literally shook us out of old identities, and metamorphosis was the result. You’ve changed a lot, changes you can’t even put your finger on, and what’s beginning to work its way to the surface is that you can no longer afford to stay stuck in go nowhere conversations. It’s stopping you from following the mystical beckoning, the bliss, and living your ever-evolving truth. You don’t need anyone’s approval to step away and you certainly don’t need them to understand. You may have to be subtle, you may have to abrupt, you may have to be neutral, you might even have to cut a fiery exit, you may have to slowly ease your way out. Whatever style of action you choose remember that the action itself is an action of self love; any communication that supports the person you are, the person you are becoming, is an action of self-love. Yes, honest communication with self and the world may lose you a few people, and situations that look secure, but in the empty space is room for something new that resonates with your very being: the kind of connectedness you've wished for your entire life.
Live loud, love fierce, and suffer no fools. Kat
Card of the Week: 9/26/2016
Subtlety: Nuance, Grace, Flow
One of my dearest friends, Marie, came over this morning for a long chant; not a chat, a chant. Marie is part of what I call my circle of home. “I’m in the mood for a long chant, like 40 minutes worth of chant,” I text-ed, and Marie was there. We were exhausted after chanting, breathless, our throats sore. We did some breathing exercises, patted ourselves all over to get back into body, and looked at each other as if to ask, “What the fuck was that?” We weren’t quite sure what had happened but something clearly had. Something subtle — that we couldn’t quite put our finger on and didn’t have the words for — but we knew we wanted more of it, whatever it was. Without saying, we both knew we would do it again next Sunday.
When I drew the subtlety card for the week, the first thing I thought was, what a lost art — subtlety. Then I remembered something I’d read in Joan Didion’s book, “The Year of Magical Thinking.” The story is about the death of her husband and her subsequent adjustment. She wrote that the first few months after her husband’s death, she was incapable of being around other human beings. It was quite simply too much for her. Without any prompting or a phone call directive, one of her best friends went to Chinatown everyday, bought a quart of congee soup, and left it on her doorstep. As Ms. Didion wrote, congee soup, she could do. What a great friend, I thought. She respected Joan’s wishes and at the same let her know she was there. In today’s culture, if someone lost a husband on a T.V. show, and the widow requested to be left alone, there would probably be an intervention (after her best friend broke a window and crawled inside) to discuss why she wanted to be alone, how wrong it was for her to be alone, and her friends’ feelings about how her wanting to be alone affected them. Sometimes people’s choices are more important than how they affect you; sometimes people’s choices have virtually nothing to do with you.
Subtlety is a quality of the wise. I watched an elder once, listening to a young witch tell her what she was going to do to the person who’d crossed her. Oh she was carrying on, the young one, smashing her fist in her hand, righteously angry, it was something to see. The elder was neutral and loving; she listened and nodded. And when the girl finished she asked the elder if she any magical recommendations. The elder thought a moment, and then she said very thoughtfully. “I might wait a month or two before I did anything.”
“I know, I know,” the young witch said quickly, defensively, “You don’t do spells when you’re angry.”
The old witch smiled. “Oh I’ve done a few, dear,” she said, “but that’s not what I’m thinking, I’m thinking you’re on a journey to know self, that’s what you told me awhile ago, and that was the whole reason you became a witch. I’m thinking your soul may have created this whole situation for you as part of your self-discovery.”
The elder spoke kindly and with respect and it was clear the young witch felt, seen, heard, and affirmed. All the ingredients were present for the discussion to devolve into a-my-way-versus-your way-battle, which the young witch, was clearly brewing for. The old witch defused the situation with love and caring and taught the young woman something at the same time, without humiliating her. The next thing I knew she was showing the young woman how to carve an uncrossing candle.
It strikes me that subtlety usually has a point, an end goal. We don’t always have to shout; we don’t always have to get in someone’s face. Sometimes a look, a glance, a tone of voice, the way we present something, a quiet, unobtrusive action, says more than an 865-page novel, and is odds on the best way to proceed. Clearly subtlety involves a certain amount of detachment and strength of character to avoid being trapped in futile battles. Ego battles. We need ego like we need our lungs, but when ego serves itself rather than the soul, the fight turns into a power battle — being right, smarter than you, more spiritual than you, more moral than you, bigger and better than you — rather than accomplishing a life-affirming goal.
I couldn’t understand why the Goddess wanted me to name the deer card I created, subtlety. Now I get it. The old witch and Joan Didion’s friend are perfect examples of heart energy, gentleness, and the ability to move through life, and whatever life presents, with grace. At the same time the deer is ever vigilant, aware of her surroundings, and can change directions in the blink of an eye. I’m flashing on Obi Wan Kanobi in the Star Wars bar.
In terms of practical application, the subtlety card has several meanings. First off, when you’re working towards a desired goal, and life tosses a monkey wrench in to your plans, don’t fight the monkey wrench. Simply look for alternative routes to get where you’re going. There are always alternative routes. Secondly, if you don’t need to shout, don’t. Don’t get me wrong I’m all for shouting if it’s called for, but ¾’s of the time it isn’t called for and will do more damage than good. Thirdly, subtlety is rooted in flow. What I know now, with the passage of a few hours, and through writing this piece, is that Marie and I were subtlety changed after that 40-minute chant. We’d experienced our connection to life more powerfully than we’d ever experienced it, and we’ve been doing this awhile. There was no question we were the same energy as the winds sweeping across the steppes, the fire burning in the cold, the sweet stream flowing through a summer meadow. We were all of that, and more, and when you come out of something like that you’re changed. The world still looks pretty much the same but you’re changed and the way you connect to you will never be the same because you know the mystery that can’t be spoken.
Live loud, love fierce, and suffer no fools. Katherine Manaan
Subtlety: Nuance, Grace, Flow
One of my dearest friends, Marie, came over this morning for a long chant; not a chat, a chant. Marie is part of what I call my circle of home. “I’m in the mood for a long chant, like 40 minutes worth of chant,” I text-ed, and Marie was there. We were exhausted after chanting, breathless, our throats sore. We did some breathing exercises, patted ourselves all over to get back into body, and looked at each other as if to ask, “What the fuck was that?” We weren’t quite sure what had happened but something clearly had. Something subtle — that we couldn’t quite put our finger on and didn’t have the words for — but we knew we wanted more of it, whatever it was. Without saying, we both knew we would do it again next Sunday.
When I drew the subtlety card for the week, the first thing I thought was, what a lost art — subtlety. Then I remembered something I’d read in Joan Didion’s book, “The Year of Magical Thinking.” The story is about the death of her husband and her subsequent adjustment. She wrote that the first few months after her husband’s death, she was incapable of being around other human beings. It was quite simply too much for her. Without any prompting or a phone call directive, one of her best friends went to Chinatown everyday, bought a quart of congee soup, and left it on her doorstep. As Ms. Didion wrote, congee soup, she could do. What a great friend, I thought. She respected Joan’s wishes and at the same let her know she was there. In today’s culture, if someone lost a husband on a T.V. show, and the widow requested to be left alone, there would probably be an intervention (after her best friend broke a window and crawled inside) to discuss why she wanted to be alone, how wrong it was for her to be alone, and her friends’ feelings about how her wanting to be alone affected them. Sometimes people’s choices are more important than how they affect you; sometimes people’s choices have virtually nothing to do with you.
Subtlety is a quality of the wise. I watched an elder once, listening to a young witch tell her what she was going to do to the person who’d crossed her. Oh she was carrying on, the young one, smashing her fist in her hand, righteously angry, it was something to see. The elder was neutral and loving; she listened and nodded. And when the girl finished she asked the elder if she any magical recommendations. The elder thought a moment, and then she said very thoughtfully. “I might wait a month or two before I did anything.”
“I know, I know,” the young witch said quickly, defensively, “You don’t do spells when you’re angry.”
The old witch smiled. “Oh I’ve done a few, dear,” she said, “but that’s not what I’m thinking, I’m thinking you’re on a journey to know self, that’s what you told me awhile ago, and that was the whole reason you became a witch. I’m thinking your soul may have created this whole situation for you as part of your self-discovery.”
The elder spoke kindly and with respect and it was clear the young witch felt, seen, heard, and affirmed. All the ingredients were present for the discussion to devolve into a-my-way-versus-your way-battle, which the young witch, was clearly brewing for. The old witch defused the situation with love and caring and taught the young woman something at the same time, without humiliating her. The next thing I knew she was showing the young woman how to carve an uncrossing candle.
It strikes me that subtlety usually has a point, an end goal. We don’t always have to shout; we don’t always have to get in someone’s face. Sometimes a look, a glance, a tone of voice, the way we present something, a quiet, unobtrusive action, says more than an 865-page novel, and is odds on the best way to proceed. Clearly subtlety involves a certain amount of detachment and strength of character to avoid being trapped in futile battles. Ego battles. We need ego like we need our lungs, but when ego serves itself rather than the soul, the fight turns into a power battle — being right, smarter than you, more spiritual than you, more moral than you, bigger and better than you — rather than accomplishing a life-affirming goal.
I couldn’t understand why the Goddess wanted me to name the deer card I created, subtlety. Now I get it. The old witch and Joan Didion’s friend are perfect examples of heart energy, gentleness, and the ability to move through life, and whatever life presents, with grace. At the same time the deer is ever vigilant, aware of her surroundings, and can change directions in the blink of an eye. I’m flashing on Obi Wan Kanobi in the Star Wars bar.
In terms of practical application, the subtlety card has several meanings. First off, when you’re working towards a desired goal, and life tosses a monkey wrench in to your plans, don’t fight the monkey wrench. Simply look for alternative routes to get where you’re going. There are always alternative routes. Secondly, if you don’t need to shout, don’t. Don’t get me wrong I’m all for shouting if it’s called for, but ¾’s of the time it isn’t called for and will do more damage than good. Thirdly, subtlety is rooted in flow. What I know now, with the passage of a few hours, and through writing this piece, is that Marie and I were subtlety changed after that 40-minute chant. We’d experienced our connection to life more powerfully than we’d ever experienced it, and we’ve been doing this awhile. There was no question we were the same energy as the winds sweeping across the steppes, the fire burning in the cold, the sweet stream flowing through a summer meadow. We were all of that, and more, and when you come out of something like that you’re changed. The world still looks pretty much the same but you’re changed and the way you connect to you will never be the same because you know the mystery that can’t be spoken.
Live loud, love fierce, and suffer no fools. Katherine Manaan
Card of the week 9/19/2016
Cosmic Order — Soul Needs, Deliberate steps, Path of the most light
During a Saturn return the needs of soul come into direct conflict with the needs of ego. The Saturn return happens once, every 27-29 years. The point of this evolutionary battle is to harness the ego, what I call the sacred masculine, to serve the soul, what I call the sacred feminine. When the ego is not serving the soul, but itself alone, it ultimately kills the soul.
The sacred masculine serves the life and the health of the (sacred feminine) soul, not as slave but as partner and compliment. For instance, I love to write. Writing for me is a soul need. My healthy ego is what says, “This work is good enough to put out in the world and this is how I’m going to do it.” In other words, I am in partnership with me. And if I can be in partnership with self, I can be in true partnership with others because I don’t need them to make me whole. I already am.
The tainted masculine, ego serving ego, attempts to run pipelines through sacred burial sites and sets dogs onto the protectors. The tainted masculine creates (profit) outside of what was freely given (air, water, the miracle of body) and orders the world accordingly. The tainted masculine is all about king of the mountain, dog eat dog, survival of the fittest, and the many living to serve the One.
Last week we dealt with metamorphosis and the sense of forced radical change. The whole summer has been about shaking off old identities and getting clear on what you don’t want in your life. For most of the people I know it's been pretty damn brutal. This week Cosmic Order is in play. The summer and last week’s metamorphosis has either aligned you with your soul needs, or moved you closer to knowing or becoming aware of your soul needs. There is a hunger to soul needs, a yearning, a damn-I-wish-I-could have-that. Right use of ego, (the sacred masculine) in this instance is about taking small, deliberate steps (serving the soul/sacred feminine) to satisfy those needs. It’s the small, deliberate steps that build to the big changes.
In the next week, take a moment to think about the things your soul years for. Then think about the feeling having that thing will give you. It could be security, love, joy, freedom, peace, etc. Now what you're going to do is take one small perfect action that gives you the feeling of (security, love, joy, freedom, peace, etc.) underneath the thing. Then take another small, perfect action that gives you the same feeling(s) and another action after that. You're working with essence here, not form; you're changing your reality by focusing and enlarging the feeling underneath the thing you want.
This is how you begin to say yes to you and if you keep it up essence will begin to attract form; maybe not in the shape you're expecting but in the shape that is in right and perfect alignment with your soul and soul needs. As you say yes to you, don’t be surprised if a voice in your head begins hissing, “You don’t have time for this. You should be doing this, that, or the other.” Know that voice is rooted in your programming/socialization and your programming/socialization was first and foremost about shaping you to fit into family, society, and culture. You’re not here to fit in; that’s not your job. You’re here to evolve into your most authentic self and connect with others on the same, diverging, or complimentary paths. That’s where you organically fit, my darlings, that's where you will feel the greatest sense of belonging, that's where you have the opportunity to fulfill the sacred writings on your soul, and that is what walking the path of light is all about.
Cosmic Order fully supports us as we begin to peel away the shackles of “should” and slowly but surely ease into our own unique being. See you next week.
Live loud, love fierce, and suffer no fools. Katherine Manaan
**********************************************************************************************
“Deposit what I'm about to tell you in your sanity bank. You don’t have the neet-neets because you’re crazy. Those critical, belittling voices in your head don’t belong to you, and they’re acting up because your life experience is telling you that you need to break free from your programming and live your myth. Not my myth, not your mother's, your father's, your husband's, society's, a lovers, but your myth.”
http://www.katherinemanaan.com/sober-witch/the-voices-in-my-head
*********************************************************************************************
September Specials at Goddess Heal Mystic !!!!
30 MINUTE READINGS = $55.00
As ever phone and skype add $5 for processing.
(This is a $15 savings.)
60 MINUTE READINGS = $110
As ever phone and skype add $5 processing
(This is a $25 savings.)
Cosmic Order — Soul Needs, Deliberate steps, Path of the most light
During a Saturn return the needs of soul come into direct conflict with the needs of ego. The Saturn return happens once, every 27-29 years. The point of this evolutionary battle is to harness the ego, what I call the sacred masculine, to serve the soul, what I call the sacred feminine. When the ego is not serving the soul, but itself alone, it ultimately kills the soul.
The sacred masculine serves the life and the health of the (sacred feminine) soul, not as slave but as partner and compliment. For instance, I love to write. Writing for me is a soul need. My healthy ego is what says, “This work is good enough to put out in the world and this is how I’m going to do it.” In other words, I am in partnership with me. And if I can be in partnership with self, I can be in true partnership with others because I don’t need them to make me whole. I already am.
The tainted masculine, ego serving ego, attempts to run pipelines through sacred burial sites and sets dogs onto the protectors. The tainted masculine creates (profit) outside of what was freely given (air, water, the miracle of body) and orders the world accordingly. The tainted masculine is all about king of the mountain, dog eat dog, survival of the fittest, and the many living to serve the One.
Last week we dealt with metamorphosis and the sense of forced radical change. The whole summer has been about shaking off old identities and getting clear on what you don’t want in your life. For most of the people I know it's been pretty damn brutal. This week Cosmic Order is in play. The summer and last week’s metamorphosis has either aligned you with your soul needs, or moved you closer to knowing or becoming aware of your soul needs. There is a hunger to soul needs, a yearning, a damn-I-wish-I-could have-that. Right use of ego, (the sacred masculine) in this instance is about taking small, deliberate steps (serving the soul/sacred feminine) to satisfy those needs. It’s the small, deliberate steps that build to the big changes.
In the next week, take a moment to think about the things your soul years for. Then think about the feeling having that thing will give you. It could be security, love, joy, freedom, peace, etc. Now what you're going to do is take one small perfect action that gives you the feeling of (security, love, joy, freedom, peace, etc.) underneath the thing. Then take another small, perfect action that gives you the same feeling(s) and another action after that. You're working with essence here, not form; you're changing your reality by focusing and enlarging the feeling underneath the thing you want.
This is how you begin to say yes to you and if you keep it up essence will begin to attract form; maybe not in the shape you're expecting but in the shape that is in right and perfect alignment with your soul and soul needs. As you say yes to you, don’t be surprised if a voice in your head begins hissing, “You don’t have time for this. You should be doing this, that, or the other.” Know that voice is rooted in your programming/socialization and your programming/socialization was first and foremost about shaping you to fit into family, society, and culture. You’re not here to fit in; that’s not your job. You’re here to evolve into your most authentic self and connect with others on the same, diverging, or complimentary paths. That’s where you organically fit, my darlings, that's where you will feel the greatest sense of belonging, that's where you have the opportunity to fulfill the sacred writings on your soul, and that is what walking the path of light is all about.
Cosmic Order fully supports us as we begin to peel away the shackles of “should” and slowly but surely ease into our own unique being. See you next week.
Live loud, love fierce, and suffer no fools. Katherine Manaan
**********************************************************************************************
“Deposit what I'm about to tell you in your sanity bank. You don’t have the neet-neets because you’re crazy. Those critical, belittling voices in your head don’t belong to you, and they’re acting up because your life experience is telling you that you need to break free from your programming and live your myth. Not my myth, not your mother's, your father's, your husband's, society's, a lovers, but your myth.”
http://www.katherinemanaan.com/sober-witch/the-voices-in-my-head
*********************************************************************************************
September Specials at Goddess Heal Mystic !!!!
30 MINUTE READINGS = $55.00
As ever phone and skype add $5 for processing.
(This is a $15 savings.)
60 MINUTE READINGS = $110
As ever phone and skype add $5 processing
(This is a $25 savings.)
Card of the Week 9/11/2016
Salamander – Fluidity, Metamorphosis, Radical Change
Salamanders are the magical creatures of the South. The South is the direction of fire, but salamanders live in damp places; under stones in streams or under logs in forests. Right off the bat there’s an opposition. In witchcraft everything contains its opposite, not in terms of opposing but in terms of compliment. When I think metamorphosis, I think big changes, meaning: I’ve never done what I’m about to do before, and I’m not quite sure how it’s going to look, or how it’s going to turn out, but I am going towards it anyway, because I really don’t have a choice, even though I know I always have a choice, but right now it feels like I don’t and it’s scaring the crap out of me.
Metamorphosis, what I think of as inevitable, radical change, always involves anxiety, sleepless nights, and stepping through a wall of fear. The moment we step through our fears we begin to have a different relationship with self and with others. It can be hard when you’re stepping through your fears to be around others who are stuck in theirs, and believe me you will notice. It’s not up to you to tell them though, that they need to step through their fear, that’s up to them to discover. Bless them and get on with your life. You take care of your side of the street. What I find particularly helpful when I’m going through radical change is I imagine myself wrapped in a black velvet cloak; that way all the actions I’m taking have time to cook inside me free of outside interference. In my experience metamorphosis is a solitary journey.
A lot has happened in the past two weeks. First we were shook out of old identities like a chew toy for a giant dog. Then we had to face what was revealed, which is triggering a major metamorphosis. You may be feeling inundated with details, you may be feeling unsure and confused about how to proceed; all you know is that you can’t hold on to an old way of living, emotionally, mentally, or spiritually. You must move forward. Even if you try to reach back to what was once secure, it will slip through your fingers like sand. Impatience will get you no where right now; consistent movement forward — small, well-thought out actions — will.
Whatever is happening, approach it as if you’re sailing a boat. Yes, you’re steering but you have to work the sails just so, to catch the wind. You have to pay attention and tack out of the way of the drunken speedboat racer and the sandbar. You have to pay attention to the currents, the tides, all the while keeping your eyes on the goal of reaching the far shore that you can’t see yet, but you know is there. You have to be aware of the thunderclouds coming up in the northeast and maybe make for shore along the way just in case a storm comes up. Once the storm passes you’ll be back on the water sailing for the far shore once again. Sailing is a moment-by-moment experience. You don’t get all bent over the obstacles and challenges in your path; you simply accept their presence, tact around them, and continue to sail for the far shore that you can’t see yet, but you know is there. Your will and the will of wind, water, and climate are in perfect synchronicity — fluid.
Live loud, love fierce, and suffer no fools. Katherine Manaan
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This month's Sober Witch: The Voices In My Head
September Goddess Heal Mystic Newsletter
****************************************************************************************************************
September Specials at Goddess Heal Mystic !!!!
30 MINUTE READINGS = $55.00
As ever phone and skype add $5 for processing.
(This is a $15 savings.)
60 MINUTE READINGS = $110
As ever phone and skype add $5 processing
(This is a $25 savings.)
Salamander – Fluidity, Metamorphosis, Radical Change
Salamanders are the magical creatures of the South. The South is the direction of fire, but salamanders live in damp places; under stones in streams or under logs in forests. Right off the bat there’s an opposition. In witchcraft everything contains its opposite, not in terms of opposing but in terms of compliment. When I think metamorphosis, I think big changes, meaning: I’ve never done what I’m about to do before, and I’m not quite sure how it’s going to look, or how it’s going to turn out, but I am going towards it anyway, because I really don’t have a choice, even though I know I always have a choice, but right now it feels like I don’t and it’s scaring the crap out of me.
Metamorphosis, what I think of as inevitable, radical change, always involves anxiety, sleepless nights, and stepping through a wall of fear. The moment we step through our fears we begin to have a different relationship with self and with others. It can be hard when you’re stepping through your fears to be around others who are stuck in theirs, and believe me you will notice. It’s not up to you to tell them though, that they need to step through their fear, that’s up to them to discover. Bless them and get on with your life. You take care of your side of the street. What I find particularly helpful when I’m going through radical change is I imagine myself wrapped in a black velvet cloak; that way all the actions I’m taking have time to cook inside me free of outside interference. In my experience metamorphosis is a solitary journey.
A lot has happened in the past two weeks. First we were shook out of old identities like a chew toy for a giant dog. Then we had to face what was revealed, which is triggering a major metamorphosis. You may be feeling inundated with details, you may be feeling unsure and confused about how to proceed; all you know is that you can’t hold on to an old way of living, emotionally, mentally, or spiritually. You must move forward. Even if you try to reach back to what was once secure, it will slip through your fingers like sand. Impatience will get you no where right now; consistent movement forward — small, well-thought out actions — will.
Whatever is happening, approach it as if you’re sailing a boat. Yes, you’re steering but you have to work the sails just so, to catch the wind. You have to pay attention and tack out of the way of the drunken speedboat racer and the sandbar. You have to pay attention to the currents, the tides, all the while keeping your eyes on the goal of reaching the far shore that you can’t see yet, but you know is there. You have to be aware of the thunderclouds coming up in the northeast and maybe make for shore along the way just in case a storm comes up. Once the storm passes you’ll be back on the water sailing for the far shore once again. Sailing is a moment-by-moment experience. You don’t get all bent over the obstacles and challenges in your path; you simply accept their presence, tact around them, and continue to sail for the far shore that you can’t see yet, but you know is there. Your will and the will of wind, water, and climate are in perfect synchronicity — fluid.
Live loud, love fierce, and suffer no fools. Katherine Manaan
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This month's Sober Witch: The Voices In My Head
September Goddess Heal Mystic Newsletter
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September Specials at Goddess Heal Mystic !!!!
30 MINUTE READINGS = $55.00
As ever phone and skype add $5 for processing.
(This is a $15 savings.)
60 MINUTE READINGS = $110
As ever phone and skype add $5 processing
(This is a $25 savings.)
There will be no weekly card September 3rd as I will be on vacation. The Weekly Card will resume September 10th. In the meantime please feel free to scroll down the page and read the previous cards. There may be something there that resonates for you. Much love, Katherine
Card of the Week 8/29/2016
Owl — Insight
Last week I drew the bat and spoke of magical death — the dying that must happen in order for the new to be born. I wrote the following: “Magical death feels like being caught in a tidal wave; you can’t fight the build of the wave and you certainly can’t fight the current. The wave breaks, and you are washed onto the beach. When you come to, you’re completely amazed you’re still alive and probably pretty confused — unsure of WTF just happened.”
The good news is this week, the waters are calming, you’re calming, and insight is going to start to nudge its way to the surface. Keeping in mind magical death leads to the resurrection of something inside you that has been dormant, the coming insight has to do with that which is being resurrected. Some of my clients are not particularly pleased with the life themes and/or aspects of self that are being resurrected. If you're bumping into something you really, really don’t like about yourself, a repeating theme, a type of behavior, a life choice, try wrapping love around it. Think of something you love beyond all reason, then take that feeling and wrap it around the thing you don’t like.
Once I had a dream and in the dream I was fighting a misshapen, pointy-headed monster. There was no question, it was either her or me, and it sure as hell wasn’t going to be me. I saw this as great progress; in the past I would have just let her kill me, that I was actually defending myself was a very big deal. I finally had the monster down, my hands on her throat, when I looked into her eyes. There was so much fear and hatred reflected back at me my breath caught in my throat. I couldn't kill her. I just couldn't. Keeping her pinned with one hand, I ran my other hand down the length of her short, cramped body, feeding in Reiki energy. She struggled against the energy and then she closed her eyes and sighed. I fed in more Reiki, and more, she started to shrink, got smaller and smaller. When I knew it was safe, I took my hand off her throat, gathered her into my lap, and kept feeding Reiki into her. She transformed into the holy child, the most beautiful, radiant redheaded little girl. I heard, “She changes everything She touches, and everything She touches changes.”
I am ever amazed that my worst self contains my best self and vice versa. Love allows me to uncover this truth. It's not about getting rid of one thing or the other, it's about allowing for healing between the two opposites. Love is alchemical; love changes everything it touches and everything it touches changes. Too often people are told to love what they don't love about themselves and that's pretty close to impossible. What you can do is wrap what you consider to be a defect, in love beyond all reason, and it will transmute and transform into the numinous.
It’s a week for groking. Are you familiar with the term grok? The term was coined by Robert A. Heinlein, in his novel, “Stranger In A Strange Land.” To grok is to empathetically understand and grasp an idea/ feeling/ concept, so deeply you don't question the validity of your own knowing. That’s the quality of insight the owl card represents. Since insight of this kind invariably leads to action, it’s a great week for calling on an angel to help you navigate through the results of your insight. Write a want ad. Write — Seeking Angel For — and write down what you need the angel to do. It can be as specific as “help me make a major move, find a job, and get into school,” or as general as “help, just help!” Once a day for seven days, sit where you won’t be disturbed and read over your angel ad. Close your eyes and feel the wings of the angel you’ve summoned to help you wrap around you. The other action that would be effective this week and works beautifully with the angel ad is to pray for right action. Say: I sincerely invite the divine within and of my sacred path to be the guiding force in this day and my life. Please guide me through (whatever you need guidance through.) Both the angel ad and the prayer will make wise use of the eclipse energy September 1st.
See y'all next week!
Live loud, love fierce, and suffer no fools. Katherine Manaan
Goddess Heal Mystic — September Newsletter
Card of the Week 8/22/2016
Bat — Magical Death, Listening to instinct, intuition, Adapt
This past Thursday we had an eclipse-that-wasn’t-an-eclipse-but-kinda-was and a full moon. If you felt a little or a lot nuts, it’s because the energy is shaking us out of old identities. When the bat shows up, what I call magical death is afoot. I acted for 15 years and then one night while I was waiting in the wings, furious with at my director, and about to go on, I thought: there has to be something with more meaning for me. Notice I said “for me.” I am not in any way disparaging acting, actors, or an art form which I respect beyond all reason.
Two weeks later I quit the show and I quit acting. My entire identity had been wrapped up in being an actress; my ego was wrapped up in being an actress, I’d dedicated 15 years of my life to being an actress and I just quit. But I honestly felt like I had no choice. Magical death feels like being caught in a tidal wave; you can’t fight the build of the wave and you certainly can’t fight the current. The wave breaks, and you are washed onto the beach. When you come to, you’re completely amazed you’re still alive and probably pretty confused — unsure of WTF just happened.
The purpose of life is to evolve. Magical death rips away the old pieces of self that no longer serve your evolution and resurrection follows. What is being resurrected is already inside you — you were born with it — and what has lain fallow your entire life now has the opportunity to come to the surface. That’s the whole point of magical death. Think of your old identity as a jungle gym. You knew those bars inside out; you knew when to swing, jump, bob, weave, and somersault. But now that the tidal wave has destroyed your jungle gym, there’s nothing but wide-open space around you and the landscape looks entirely different. What are you doing to do now?
First things first. Know that whatever is being resurrected will put you more in touch with your authentic self. Uncomfortable as that can be, it is ultimately more comfortable and beneficial to live as the ever evolving, thinking, feeling human being you are, rather then what people/programming expect you to be. The authentic self is the divine self, the sacred self, made visible in the world through our interactions with others. When we resurrect after magical death, we meet a piece of self we don’t know. Getting to know that piece is going to change the way we interact with self and the world. Like magical death, resurrection has its own current; its own force, you can’t dictate the terms or the timing. You can however surf the currents.
Think growing down, (a term coined by Lorna Bevan at Hare in the Moon astrology) Create a time when you will not be disturbed. Unplug everything. Sit comfortably on a chair or the floor, and do the Tara chant for 5 minutes. If you have mala beads, chant around the mala 4-5 times.
(I have written the Tara chant as it sounds as the end of this post.)
When you’ve finished chanting, inhale and exhale three times, nice and slow. On the exhale, feel the tension drain out of your feet. Now, imagine dropping a root from the base of your spine deep into the earth, into the heart of the earth. Imagine a root growing off the main root into the east of the earth, another root into the south of the earth, another root into the west of the earth and another root into the north of the earth. The energy of the four directions flows into the main root joining the energy from the heart of the earth and traveling up, up into your body. Contain the energy. Visualize a quiet place of peace; it can be a pond, the mountains, the ocean. You can visualize anywhere from 5 minutes to 30. When you’re finished, release your root into the earth.
Say the following prayer:
I sincerely invite the divine within and of my sacred path to be the guiding force in this day and my life.
Say the following affirmations:
I deeply love and approve of myself.
I am magnetic and receptive to my deepest and highest good.
I am willing to be willing to trust in my process.
Tara Chant/ written exactly like it sounds, which means it's spelled incorrectly.
OM TAR RA TOO
TAR REE RAY
SWA HA
Have a great week my darlings.
Live loud, love fierce, and suffer no fools. Kat
For a soul reading with Kat
August Soul Nurture: Living Witch: The Power of Self-love
Bat — Magical Death, Listening to instinct, intuition, Adapt
This past Thursday we had an eclipse-that-wasn’t-an-eclipse-but-kinda-was and a full moon. If you felt a little or a lot nuts, it’s because the energy is shaking us out of old identities. When the bat shows up, what I call magical death is afoot. I acted for 15 years and then one night while I was waiting in the wings, furious with at my director, and about to go on, I thought: there has to be something with more meaning for me. Notice I said “for me.” I am not in any way disparaging acting, actors, or an art form which I respect beyond all reason.
Two weeks later I quit the show and I quit acting. My entire identity had been wrapped up in being an actress; my ego was wrapped up in being an actress, I’d dedicated 15 years of my life to being an actress and I just quit. But I honestly felt like I had no choice. Magical death feels like being caught in a tidal wave; you can’t fight the build of the wave and you certainly can’t fight the current. The wave breaks, and you are washed onto the beach. When you come to, you’re completely amazed you’re still alive and probably pretty confused — unsure of WTF just happened.
The purpose of life is to evolve. Magical death rips away the old pieces of self that no longer serve your evolution and resurrection follows. What is being resurrected is already inside you — you were born with it — and what has lain fallow your entire life now has the opportunity to come to the surface. That’s the whole point of magical death. Think of your old identity as a jungle gym. You knew those bars inside out; you knew when to swing, jump, bob, weave, and somersault. But now that the tidal wave has destroyed your jungle gym, there’s nothing but wide-open space around you and the landscape looks entirely different. What are you doing to do now?
First things first. Know that whatever is being resurrected will put you more in touch with your authentic self. Uncomfortable as that can be, it is ultimately more comfortable and beneficial to live as the ever evolving, thinking, feeling human being you are, rather then what people/programming expect you to be. The authentic self is the divine self, the sacred self, made visible in the world through our interactions with others. When we resurrect after magical death, we meet a piece of self we don’t know. Getting to know that piece is going to change the way we interact with self and the world. Like magical death, resurrection has its own current; its own force, you can’t dictate the terms or the timing. You can however surf the currents.
Think growing down, (a term coined by Lorna Bevan at Hare in the Moon astrology) Create a time when you will not be disturbed. Unplug everything. Sit comfortably on a chair or the floor, and do the Tara chant for 5 minutes. If you have mala beads, chant around the mala 4-5 times.
(I have written the Tara chant as it sounds as the end of this post.)
When you’ve finished chanting, inhale and exhale three times, nice and slow. On the exhale, feel the tension drain out of your feet. Now, imagine dropping a root from the base of your spine deep into the earth, into the heart of the earth. Imagine a root growing off the main root into the east of the earth, another root into the south of the earth, another root into the west of the earth and another root into the north of the earth. The energy of the four directions flows into the main root joining the energy from the heart of the earth and traveling up, up into your body. Contain the energy. Visualize a quiet place of peace; it can be a pond, the mountains, the ocean. You can visualize anywhere from 5 minutes to 30. When you’re finished, release your root into the earth.
Say the following prayer:
I sincerely invite the divine within and of my sacred path to be the guiding force in this day and my life.
Say the following affirmations:
I deeply love and approve of myself.
I am magnetic and receptive to my deepest and highest good.
I am willing to be willing to trust in my process.
Tara Chant/ written exactly like it sounds, which means it's spelled incorrectly.
OM TAR RA TOO
TAR REE RAY
SWA HA
Have a great week my darlings.
Live loud, love fierce, and suffer no fools. Kat
For a soul reading with Kat
August Soul Nurture: Living Witch: The Power of Self-love
Card of the Week 8/15/2016
Bridge – Connect
In answer to the questions I have received…I drew the Woman Wild Oracle Cards almost 10 years ago, in the Bronx, at SunRose Aromatics. They were based on the angel cards only instead of using angels; I used symbols of the Goddess. Ultimately I named cards, the Woman Wild Oracle.
The Bridge: The Bridge is about ignoring the petty bullshit and connecting with that which holds resonance for you. The bridge speaks of opportunity(s) to connect, to lay foundation, to bring together disparate points of view. Bridges are neutral; the points they connect rarely are. Try not to internalize the volatility of either side. Instead, literally see yourself building as strong a bridge as possible. Use your imagination; how many in your crew, where are you building the bridge, is it a suspension bridge, a rope bridge, a wooden bridge, covered, uncovered? Think of the bridge you are building as an invitation; you are creating an invitation, inviting people to walk across, and your bridge is so wonderful looking it’s hard to refuse.
The card can also mean you are your own bridge out of futile battles. You know the ones, arguments you can’t possibly win that go round and round and round. The argument can be with another person or even with you. If it’s with another person, give them a rest; step away. Don’t even think of building bridges between points of dysfunctional. Instead, think of holding a mirrored shield and mirror them back onto their shining path and off of yours. Be gentle, be firm, be consistent. If it’s a battle with you, you can be pretty sure you’re caught in a critical loop, where you are continually coming up lacking. It’s akin to all the times you’ve awakened to noise in your head, pain in your heart, and said I am just not in the mood for this today.
When I wake up and the noise is on me, I pretend I’m Tarzan. I beat my chest and holler; “AHEEAHEEAH!” Then I grab a vine, and swing myself up onto one of the rope bridges that run through the jungle. Birds screech and the monkeys applaud as I walk across the bridge and into my day. If nothing else the exercise will make you laugh and there is no better bridge to the other side, than laughter:):)
Live loud, love fierce and suffer no fools, Kat (aka Katherine Manaan)
To sign up for the Goddess Heal Mystic Newsletter, writings, and specials, click here.
August "Sober Witch," The Power of Self-love: click here.
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Card for the week, 8/8/2016
Kheperi – “I am the becoming, coming forth by day, I become the night, I become the day, I am the becoming.” Kheperi chant.
Take a moment and think of how your external circumstances color the expression of your being. For instance, when I was actively raising a child, I was first and foremost a mother. My identity was completely wrapped up in being a mother. It was my focus, the lens through which I viewed my life. Today, I am still a mother but not parenting 24-7 and no longer see life through the lens of a mother raising a child but through the cat eye of the crone.
I love to think of life experience as ingredients. I think of astrological and numerical charts as ingredients also and the phases of life. You are born with the power to figure out what kind of cake you’re going to make. You’re born with the power to mix your ingredients together anyway you’d like. The culture is hell bent on programming people to believe that they are utterly without power to impact much of anything. This is a great big lie. We have the same power as the sun that rises and sets and rises again. We are ever becoming, developing, creating, bringing forth and destroying that which has no benefit. That’s hard to remember in the midst of the horrors we see on a daily basis, but those horrors can only be changed if we reclaim our power, individually and collectively. Right use of power is love made visible; power meant to keep you groveling on your knees is mutant.
To reclaim your power is to recognize and own your ability to energetically impact your life. Life experience is part of ever becoming; it ultimately colors who and what we are, who and what we become. Like the sun we live, we die, we are reborn; we are dawn, day, dusk, and night. This week, practice rooting. Drop a root from the base of your spine deep into the earth. Imagine four separate roots growing from the main root. One reaches into the east of the earth, one into the south of the earth, one into the west of the earth and one into the north of the earth. This root configuration will put you in the flow of your becoming, which will connect to other’s becoming. As our truth connects, we grow in strength, not by denying what’s happening, but by taking right action to maintain our humanity.
Have a great week.
Live loud, Love fierce, and suffer no fools. Kat (aka Katherine Manaan)
To sign up for Goddess Heal Mystic Newsletter, writings, and specials
click here.
To sign up for the monthly "Sober Witch," click here.
Card for the week, 8/8/2016
Kheperi – “I am the becoming, coming forth by day, I become the night, I become the day, I am the becoming.” Kheperi chant.
Take a moment and think of how your external circumstances color the expression of your being. For instance, when I was actively raising a child, I was first and foremost a mother. My identity was completely wrapped up in being a mother. It was my focus, the lens through which I viewed my life. Today, I am still a mother but not parenting 24-7 and no longer see life through the lens of a mother raising a child but through the cat eye of the crone.
I love to think of life experience as ingredients. I think of astrological and numerical charts as ingredients also and the phases of life. You are born with the power to figure out what kind of cake you’re going to make. You’re born with the power to mix your ingredients together anyway you’d like. The culture is hell bent on programming people to believe that they are utterly without power to impact much of anything. This is a great big lie. We have the same power as the sun that rises and sets and rises again. We are ever becoming, developing, creating, bringing forth and destroying that which has no benefit. That’s hard to remember in the midst of the horrors we see on a daily basis, but those horrors can only be changed if we reclaim our power, individually and collectively. Right use of power is love made visible; power meant to keep you groveling on your knees is mutant.
To reclaim your power is to recognize and own your ability to energetically impact your life. Life experience is part of ever becoming; it ultimately colors who and what we are, who and what we become. Like the sun we live, we die, we are reborn; we are dawn, day, dusk, and night. This week, practice rooting. Drop a root from the base of your spine deep into the earth. Imagine four separate roots growing from the main root. One reaches into the east of the earth, one into the south of the earth, one into the west of the earth and one into the north of the earth. This root configuration will put you in the flow of your becoming, which will connect to other’s becoming. As our truth connects, we grow in strength, not by denying what’s happening, but by taking right action to maintain our humanity.
Have a great week.
Live loud, Love fierce, and suffer no fools. Kat (aka Katherine Manaan)
To sign up for Goddess Heal Mystic Newsletter, writings, and specials
click here.
To sign up for the monthly "Sober Witch," click here.
